"Be upstanding for his Lordship Mr Justice Tricklebarrow!"
A hush descended on the courtroom as the great man made his entrance. Attired in a somewhat shabby robe and unwashed wig, he appeared to stare rather blankly around the sumptuously panelled room before lowering his ample frame into the finely carved and upholstered seat. The court, full to capacity for such an important case, followed suit.
     Pale shafts of sunlight arrowed through the leaded windows as Sir Charles Digby-Pugh QC, Council for the Prosecution, rose to his feet. The courtroom was hushed.
     "Your Lordship, members of the jury, the defendants before you today stand accused of the most dastardly and heinous crime. It is alleged that on the night of the fifth of June last, in the Borough of Hackney, they did wilfully and maliciously murder......
    .....Claud Tricklebarrow rolled his tongue round the roof of his mouth. He was sure a piece of one of the prunes he`d eaten for breakfast had somehow become lodged behind his new set of dentures. It really was most annoying. For some reason he wasn`t called upon to sit in judgement of his fellow man much nowadays and he liked to do his best when the chance arose. He let his tongue explore the base of his mouth. Maybe if he`d taken Cybil`s advice and only had the fruit juice for breakfast....
     "And furthermore, members of the jury, the Prosecution will prove beyond any reasonable doubt that these two men standing before you in the dock today, used the bloodstained axe and baseball bat, exhibits A and B,to bludgeon this poor unfortunate wretch....
      .....Trouble was he liked prunes. Apart from the ability to keep one `regular` he rather enjoyed the somewhat erotic feeling of them sliding whole down his throat. Then there was the juice of course, usually ice-cold from the refrigerator. This he was sure helped to keep his larynx in tip-top condition, essential in his line of work. Cybil didn`t like them of course, never had done- Damn! there it was again..perhaps if he could get behind his new dentures with one of the court paper clips.....
       "And you will hear, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, from an eye witness, Mr Harold Pickersgill, who overheard the two accused bragging in a dockland pub, how they had trussed this poor man in a weighted sack and dropped it off Putney bridge. Would they have been so jovial, members of the jury,  had they known that his very sack would split open depositing the severed....
      .....He should have been measured for new dentures years ago of course, but he`d had a morbid fear of dentists ever since, as a young Barrister, one of them had extracted three of his perfectly good teeth before discovering his excruciating pain was coming from an abscess in his lower jaw. Maybe if he could just slip his top set out he might be able to see.....
      "You will also hear, members of the jury, how Mr Pickergill heard the accused bragging that they were, and I quote:`businessmen who had just made a killing in the city-
     "Objection your Honour!  Mr James Urquart-Smith QC, for the defence, rose to his feet. "My learned friend is trying to influence the jury with what is clearly nothing more than hearsay evidence...."
     .....Funny, even with the top set out he couldn`t feel any sign of the prune in his mouth. Perhaps it was lodged somewhere on the denture itself....
      "Would your Lordship like me to repeat my objection in order that....
     .....Strange looking things, false teeth. Still he supposed it stopped one walking about looking like a wizened old fossil. Wizened old fossil. That`s what he was now really. A relic from the past. How old was he? Seventy-three? Or was it seventy-five? Yes that was it, seventy-five. Cybil kept telling him it was time he retired but as long as he had his faculties he owed it to his profession to keep going. After all he`d come late to the bench. Let`s see, he must have been....
     "If it will help your Lordship, I withdraw my objection....
     .......Fifty-six. He remembered because it had coincided with Cybil`s birthday. What a night that  was. They`d gone to the Cafe Royal and he`d had rather to much to drink. He`d had his first case the following morning. It was a dreary divorce and it took him all his time to stay awake. Ah, happy days. Now, where on earth was that confounded piece of prune...  
       "I would now like to call, with your permission your Lordship, the first prosecution witness...."
      ......Perhaps it wasn`t a bit of food at all! That was it! There was something wrong with the blessed dentures. Nothing to do with the prunes at all.....
      "Please take the book in your right hand and read what is on the card..."
      ......He`d have to go back to the dentist. Damned inconvenient of course...
     "I swear by almighty god to tell the truth the whole....
     .......He recognised that voice. Good old Cybil. She must have called him. He`d be okay now. Good man, for a dentist, was old Pickersgill....