READING ROOM
Great Writing - Home
Read and review others' work
Articles on writing
Advice from the community
COMMUNITY
Talk to others in the forums
Events and Competitions
GW News
ABOUT GREAT WRITING
All About Us
Contact Us
WORK AWAITING REVIEW
GW IS...
Great Writing creative writing community is designed to prompt ideas and provide inspiration and motivation within aspiring and amateur authors. Whatever your topic; from love poetry to Doctor Who or Harry Potter fan fiction, Great Writing's online writing group is where you can make new friends and improve your creative writing.
WHO'S ONLINE
We have 1360 guests online and 5 members online
Shorts
The Critic
By Leo
30 May 2006
This piece was created after i was inundated by a single request to provide a back story to 'The death of a critic'

Nigel Napier.
 
Shall I tell you about Nigel Napier?
 
His personal history is shrouded in mystery. There is never any mention of a wife or any children. It seems Mr Napier has always been a solitary creature. Rumour has it, that once upon a time he was an English master at a boy’s school. The whisper is, that he was forced out after a scandal with a young boarder. It was never substantiated, and I’m only mentioning now, because I feel it’s safe to do so.
 
Nobody knows where he went next; whatever he did I’m sure he was painfully alone. There is one indisputable fact about our Mr Napier, and that is this; he is ill built to function alongside others. His sneering sense of superiority, along with his lack of courtesy and charm set him apart from normal people.
 
I think, that to this day, he genuinely feels hard done by. I’m sure he still blames the boy. It was probably his fault, he was asking for it. If you ask me, I think that it was his sense of isolation and his enduring bitterness that drove him to that most lonely of professions; the critic.
 
I must make it clear; I’m not completely biased, I do actually believe he has talent. His ability to assemble words on and page, and co-ordinate sentences into a meaningful whole, is very, very impressive. It’s just the vindictiveness with which he wields his talent that is so very.. disappointing. It’s like a big, ugly stick in the hands of a bully. And like a bully, he doesn’t set out to kill his prey, merely wound them. Then with a sneering glee, he watches on, as they stumble or crawl, broken and bruised, back to their place of sanctuary. The years have clearly fermented his disdain for others. The older he gets the lonelier he feels, the more poisonous his writings become.
 
So it was that that Nigel Napier entered my life. I didn’t invite him. He just blundered in. I had published my own novel; a true labour of love. It had taken almost three years of my life and had finally cost me £800 to get printed. This might not sound much, but it was to me. I had taken it out of the meagre savings that I had set aside for my son. To me this was going to be an investment in his future. If I could get an agent, get a proper publishing deal, maybe an advance of a couple of thousand pounds – I would be happy. I could then put his money back with interest. I hoped one day my son would be proud. Friends and family had been very supportive. And so it was that I took that leap of faith that only the young or foolhardy can, without looking. I handed in my notice and pinned everything on giving others my voice.
 
He needn’t have bothered himself with my meagre effort. I had put up on my own website, and was just trying to publicise it. But to him, I guess it was a piece of sport. ‘How not to write’, had been the title of the piece in his column. “This shambolic effort lacks any identifiable thread, or offers any meaningful thesis… the author, and I will use that term lightly, is clumsy, inept, inarticulate and wholly unsuited to writing… he should do us all a favour, go back to his pointless meaningless existence..”
 
And that was it. My hopes and dreams had been torn brutally into tiny pieces before my very eyes. I never sold another copy of my book. My career was at an end, before it had started. My parents advised me to put my writing to one side. They offered kind words of support, before gently pointing out that some people were just not cut out to be writers. They implored me to return to work. Other family members were less kind, they made fun of me at those gatherings we all have from time to time; birthdays and barbeques etc. For me, the worst thing of all was that I never replaced my son’s savings. To him I would forever be a failure. After the pain, and embarrassment, I felt dead inside. I became empty, lonely and without purpose.
 
And then one night, as I used a bottle of cheap vodka to deaden the pain, I had my flash of inspiration. In a heartbeat, I had discovered my purpose. I, me-yes me, would make sure Nigel Napier didn’t dash another hope or shatter another dream. If I achieved this I would truly have served some useful function. My son could be proud. My life would really, and I mean really, have had some meaning. The critic had to die.
 
And so it is that I sit in this pub. I’m waiting for him to assume his normal seat. He’s a creature of habit. So predictable. I know he will materialise soon. And then I will have my vengeance. Hang on.. yes.. yes.. it’s him!.. guess who’s just walked through the door..

Reviews
Hi Leo
Written by cynicsid (177 comments posted) 30th May 2006
If you promise to put the Bottle down, 
 
"Hang on.. yes.. yes.. it’s him!..  
 
guess who’s just walked through the door.." 
 
 
I had this now controlled urge to write 
 
"Evening Leo, Pint of your usual" 
 
"Thanks Siddie and a bag of gherkin and Hamster Crisps" 
 
Seriously the line works "spoken" cos it's out and then gone, but written it lingers. I'd be tempted to cut it and drop the second part. 
 
Siddie 
 
The Pre-quel
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3298 comments posted) 31st May 2006
Yes, fulfilling the demands of an anxious readership can be onerous. I like to tailor my work so I always leave them shouting for less.But you have risen to the challenge of the pre-quel with brio (I've been dying to use that word) 
I think you've created an interesting and well realised character.perhaps a bit stereotypical for a critic,sometimes it's fun to throw something really different into the mix. 
It's been said critics are just failed writers but then sadly so are most writers....hey-ho 
cheers  
BBS
Thank you for this back story!
Written by Leigh (226 comments posted) 31st May 2006
You create a suitably grubby past for Nigel Napier that is believable. 
 
I enjoyed this. I'm sure many a writer could identify with this longing to exact revenge on a vindictive critic - even if they don't actually resort to the measures that your narrator does! 
 
You did a great job on this, I could really feel the author's disappointment and bitterness, especially after ploughing his son's money into self-publishing.
inspiring feedback!
Written by Leo (573 comments posted) 31st May 2006
Siddie; your ruthless editors eye (ear? finger?) is as ever bang on the money... i wasn't sure if the last line was necessary, so left it in and hoped nobody would notice! 
 
Surfer Queen: You're on the nose as well! I suppose going down the route of playing to a stereotype is a bit lazy. i personally blame the vitamin pills (your class A drugs have yet to arrive in my private writing quarters!) 
 
Leigh: i'm really glad you like it. I guess wanting to 'whack' the critic is something many of us can identify with.. i've personally got three under the garden extension, but theres room for more....
good read...
Written by woody44 (774 comments posted) 31st May 2006
...and then? And then I will have my vengeance. 
This is how I would have finished it Leo, but this, as has been said many times before, is down to personal choice. I liked this piece Leo. I liked the style and the clever use of words. You have built a strong image of our Mr Napier, to the point where, for all his nastiness, one can`t help feeling a certain sympathy for the man. Well done. There is not a lot wrong with your writing son!  
 
 
happy writing... 
woody 
the end is nigh
Written by Leo (573 comments posted) 31st May 2006
Getting the end right is definitely the hardest part for me 
 
I normally have no concept of where i'm going from the off, so i just cross my fingers and hope it falls right 
 
I'm learning from reading a lot of the other pieces on the site, watching the old (and not so old!) pros at work...so theres still hope! 
 
cheers again! 
 
leo
I think I know him!!
Written by netkwake (26 comments posted) 31st May 2006
Hi Leo, 
 
I enjoyed this, the Napier character you created is actually out there, I think there is one in every speciality. 
 
They don't quite make it to the top so in order to exact revenge on the cruel world they set out on a quest to make sure no-one else does. 
 
He won't do it again though will he? 
 
Great read 
 
netkwake

Written by jean.day (2257 comments posted) 1st June 2006
I enjoyed this one too. You really painted a believable picture of both the critic and the author, and put real emotion into how any of us who writes feels when the work that we thought was pretty good is savaged. I look forward to reading the rest of your writing.
Good stuff
Written by mishmish (389 comments posted) 2nd June 2006
I enjoyed this very much. I like something that is morbidly humourous. I think I've come across agents like Napier! 
 
Unfortunately, being new to all this, I read this first then I read the 'death of the critic'...Both are great! It all makes sense now. For some reason I thought this was a 'real' critic.  
 
best wishes 
 
mishmish 
 

   Only registered users can rate and write comments.
   Please login or register.

Powered by AkoComment 2.0!

 Previous item   Next item