|
By gutterkitty
|
|
03 June 2006 |
|
I could smell the paint
as I walked around the house.
No one was waiting inside,
but I could hear pigeons in the walls
as I moved from room to room
stripped bare,
raw wood and electrical cords
spilling forth.
A naked room
I am become its heart,
the only beat,
a line across its silence.
I find myself, legs folded on the floor.
I wonder when they all moved out
and tore the wallpaper down.
I wonder if it hurt |
thought provoking
Written by Leo (573 comments posted) 3rd June 2006 | | You made me think.. you are almost like a donor moving into a host body. and every transition brings pain.. | thank you
Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 3rd June 2006 | this poem is open to interpretation, and it's interesting to know yours. I'm glad it made you think, and that you understand it, in your own way... | Deep and intriguing
Written by mishmish (389 comments posted) 4th June 2006 | I agree with Leo, this poem is less about moving in to a new house, and more about an organ transplant..
The words..
"Stripped bare,
Raw wood and electrical cords
Spilling forth"
This someone in an operation, 'stripped bare' - cut open with a scalpel; 'raw woods and electrical cords' the bone and arteries 'spilling forth' the blood.
"A line across its silence" - this implied almost the body flat-lining - just a beat against the silence - that is death.
There is a mystical resonance to this poem, an out of body experience - the retrospection 'I wonder if it hurt'.
This is a beautiful piece of poetry.
best wishes
mishmish
|
Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 4th June 2006 | | thank you so much! It means a lot to me that you like it. And you're right about those lines being a metaphor for a body, and about the flat-lining, though interestingly I didn't have an operation on my mind when I wrote it! It came into my head fully formed. I would explain further but the fact that you can't be certain of what it means is part of what I like about it. Thank you for giving my poem your time |
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3331 comments posted) 5th June 2006 | I too liked this; for me it means we do more than just live in houses. We bond with them and they take a living aspect to the point where they are are skin, our protection from outside harm. We give them the life and vitality.And does the house hurt when you leave, an interesting thought. Probably not what you meant but good writing lends itself to other interpretations
BBS | thank you
Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 6th June 2006 | | I agree that some of the best poetry lends itself to other interprations- thank you for sharing yours with me. I think we underestimate the importance that we place on our homes. I certainly see mine as a refuge! |
Only registered users can rate and write comments.
Please login or register. Powered by AkoComment 2.0! |
Previous item
