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By gutterkitty
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16 June 2006 |
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The men came with their hats
your fingers, each smiling
to cut down my branches,
one by one.
Do you want to cut down my limbs
so that no one can climb me?
Your breath, teeth on wood
carved your name
on the inside of my thigh.
I'll sing, every leaf
those crushed in your hand.
The men in hats,
tearing.
Will you use my limbs again
one by one, before I lie? |
Birds
Written by Buchan (42 comments posted) 16th June 2006 | | Wonderful in content and meaning. I wish more people would think in this way. Birds are so important as are the trees. Good thinking poem. Thank you for writing and sharing. Well Done. | lovely writing
Written by Leo (573 comments posted) 16th June 2006 | | apart from the fact that this is a lovely thoughtful piece of writing, it reminded me that me are better at deconstructing and destroying things... | Beautiful and deep
Written by mishmish (389 comments posted) 16th June 2006 | hi Gutterkitty
This is a beautiful piece of poetry. The symbolism of the words:
'Your fingers, each smiling' and 'Your breath, teeth on wood'
screamed to me of the brutality involved destroying a tree. The fact you tied the 'human' description, 'fingers, breath, crushed in your hand' underlines that although it is machines who do the destruction, it is 'man' who makes the decision to do it.
It almost seemed to me that the 'Birds' of the title are the 'watchers' to all this destruction, and they pay the price by default.
A truly beautiful poem...powerful and very deep. I loved it.
Best wishes
mishmish
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Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 18th June 2006 | | thank you for your comments! I was talking with a friend when the idea came to mind- she mentioned that when she was a child, the branches of the trees she would climb were cut down by the city council. It made me think about how we sometimes hurt people, and why. | thoughtful...
Written by isobel* (26 comments posted) 3rd September 2006 | this is a lovely piece of writing - what has been said above i cannot add to, except to say that it recalls to me a dream i once had about a fallen tree that had been hit several times with an axe. The tree was removed from the forest and taken to a hospital where the wounds had to be bandaged up and tended to, the same way a child with a wounded arm might.
this image has always stuck in my head, probably because i am quite conscious of how fond i am of trees as living things.
im sorry if this sounds a tad crazy, but i had to mention it!
a very moving, thoughtful poem
isobel. | Like
Written by wildworm (7 comments posted) 20th November 2006 | Like this. Fav part is the thigh stanza. Have a question though.
Should the last word be "die" or maybe even "lay".
Maybe "before I'm laid" might even work better. I know what your saying but it just doesn't sound right to me for some reason, maybe it's because I just got off a 12plus hour work shift a couple hours ago.
Perhaps I'll come back to it when refleshed and see if I have a change of mind about that part. But anyhow, did like both the presentation and the message conveyed...
-Eddy |
Written by NathanRoberts (277 comments posted) 25th February 2008 | At the moment you're the only contributor on here whose work I read repeatedly. So subtle, flowing and graceful. An inspiration.
Thanks. |
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