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Poetry
waiting sea
By ellyb39
18 June 2006
Solid mass of sea stirred shingle
Quietly  gently    surging,
Hiding, secrets of the sea
Backwards forwards ever beating
Breathing of the waves

I hear you in my sleep
I hear you in my dreams

Cascading cliffs clutch the land pulled by tidal fingers
Wild tempers over years of
Wind fuelled white invaders
 Sandstone cleansed away

I see you in the far light
I see all your schemes

Moon washed beach is waiting
Biding time, needing time
Secrets healing over human span
Landscape warped by man
Pounding  pulling tidechanged  lifetimes
 
 
I knew you in the forming
I know you at the last.

Edge glittering froth,   soaking sand below
Lonely lastwaves wash the pebbles
Scouring off the scum
Gulls survey with jaded eye while
Dawn deciphers codes

I feel you in my future
I felt you in my past.


May 6th 2006







Reviews

Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 18th June 2006
The language of this poem is wonderful- "Cascading cliffs clutch the land pulled by tidal fingers"- but I think that it maybe comes too thick and fast and perhaps obscures your meaning? It's very well written but I find there's so much "going on" that lines such as the one above can be passed by, and not recognised as they really should be! Good work :)  
Nice writing
Written by Leo (573 comments posted) 18th June 2006
Enjoyed your writing 
 
look forward to more..
Beautiful Imagery
Written by mishmish (389 comments posted) 19th June 2006
Hi Elly 
 
There is some fabulous images here. The way you blend words they easily have multiple meanings. 
 
I don't know why, but as I read this, and I've read it number of times, I got the feeling that 'we' as humans are inextricably linked the 'sea', not just because we're on this planet, somehow at a deeper level. Maybe because we too are mostly water... 
 
Anyway, that said, this is truly beautiful writing. 
 
Well done  
 
best wishes 
 
mishmish

Written by ellyb39 (79 comments posted) 19th June 2006
Thanks for your kind words, I must admit on re reading I agree with gutter kitty, the poem seems a little too cluttered and i think it needs streamlining a bit... this is my trouble put everything in all at once!

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