Sometimes you just hear things and think “As a writer of fiction, you wouldn’t dare to make it up ... !”

I heard a “filler” on a Radio 4 News bulletin about some things people have managed to forget on Public Transport ..... as I listened, the following ditty suggested itself, and the melody was suggested by my febrile imagination!

On the First bus from Clapham, I lost when I got off:  a jar full of fresh bull’s sperm
On the Second ...........................................................:   two rubber boats, and .........
On the Third   ............................................................:   three dead bats,
On the Fourth  ...........................................................:    four blow-up dolls

Who said Truth was Stranger than Fiction???????????