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Comedy
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| Breakfast with Marilyn | |
| By jean.day | ||||||||||||||
| 04 July 2006 | ||||||||||||||
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This is the first time I've tried this type of writing. But it is pretty much verbatim so I could have put it in non-fiction. BREAKFAST WITH MARILYN A one act Play By Jean Day Picture on cover of play book should be group photo outside restaurant featuring all of cast except the waitress. Cover should have large notice on it: Not to be Tidied Away Another notice near the bottom: This cover is asbestos, so don’t even try burning it Larry. ***** Scene: Restaurant connected with motel in north part of Bismarck Time: 8:35 a.m. June 22, 2006 Cast of characters: Waitress: Young, slim and pretty. Wearing black skirt and white blouse. Grace (step-mother): proud of her 89 years, walks with some difficulty due to spinal fusion and arthritis, has quite advanced macular degeneration, but very sharp brain and active social life. She is about 5’5”, somewhat stout, with her smart white wig covering her thin hair; wearing an embroidered shirt and blue slacks. Larry (brother-in-law): just got his social security number, but has been retired for 8 years, and happily spends all of his time golfing, fishing, woodworking, mowing his lawn and fixing up his five (two classic) cars. He also keeps a very tidy house. About 5’5”, slim build, white hair now somewhat thin on top, wearing jean shorts and a short sleeved plaid shirt. Philip (husband): retirement age but has no intention of retiring. 5’10”, solid build, not much grey in his hair. Wearing beigeshorts and a yellow knit polo shirt. Marilyn(cousin): few years older than Jean, looking much younger than her years, bright blond short hair, glasses with a picture etched in the corner of the glass. Wearing size extra large, but not as large as in the past, green, cuffed short shorts and matching sleeveless top (designer labels). Bob (Marilyn’s long suffering husband): retirement age, but not retired, tall, slim, with short curly hair (wasn’t like that when he was 25), wearing Western style shirt, tight jeans, big silver belt and pointy cowboy boots. (I’m sure his Stetson was in the car.) Bob sells insurance products and enjoys Country and Western everything. Jean - younger and slimmer than any of the cast except the waitress, but that isn’t saying much, as she is neither slim nor young. Her hair, only a bit of grey, cut short and worn straight (first time in thirty years) so she looks almost more like her dead sister than herself, which everyone notices. Wearing flowered shorts and a black top. ***** Grace, Larry, Philip and Jean enter the restaurant foyer. Philip has a look over in the main eating area to see if Marilyn and Bob have arrived but doesn’t see them. Waitress: Good morning. Are you here for breakfast? Philip: Yes, but all of our party are not here yet. Waitress: How many will you be? Philip: Six. Waitress: Why don’t I get you a table for six and then you can be looking at the menus until your other parties arrive. Philip: Thank you. The group is ushered to a large round table near the centre of the restaurant. There are only one or two other tables with customers. Grace: Marilyn is often late, so we should expect that. She wasn’t very pleased at the timing of this get together, so be prepared for her to give you a hard time about it. Waitress: Will you all have decaff? Philip: No, real coffee for me please. Larry: Me too. Grace: I’ll have decaff. Jean: Real coffee for me too. Five minutes pass while the waitress busies around putting out cups and filling them from one or the other of two large thermoses. She puts out 6 big menus. Philip: Here they are now. Marilyn and Bob, how nice to see you. Come and join us. Marilyn: Geez. What a goddamn time to have a get together. I didn’t know there was an 8.30 in the morning. I normally don’t get up til 10. Anyway, nice to see you, Philip (giving him a big hug) and you Grace are looking better than ever. And Larry, you haven’t changed a bit. And Jeanie, you look more like your mother every day. (hugs all around). Larry: And like Judy. Grace: And like your Dad. Jean: I must look like a jigsaw puzzle. Philip: Good to see you Bob. How are you? Are you retired yet? Marilyn: No he hasn’t and he isn’t going to either. Weekends are bad enough. Philip: I haven’t retired either. Jean won’t let me. Marilyn: You’re retired, aren’t you Larry? How long is it now since Judy has been gone? Larry: Eight years in September. Marilyn: You two were always so cute together. Did you make her get up at 8.30 in the morning too? Jean: Marilyn, this is late for Larry. He usually gets up at 5. He got mad at us yesterday because we didn’t get on the road until 6.17. Marilyn: My God, Larry, why? Larry: Well, there’s always lots to do and you can’t get it done in bed. Marilyn: Well, if I was in bed with you, you might change your mind. Don’t you agree Bob? (Giggles and looks of embarrassment all around, and almost of shock on Larry’s face imagining what being in bed with Marilyn would be like.) Bob: Yeah, sure. (with a little grin) Jean: Not only is Larry early, but he is neat. You should see his house, Marilyn. Not a magazine or a book on display. Not even salt and pepper or sugar on the table. Literally nothing on the kitchen counters. I had to hunt in his cupboards to find a coffee pot and a tea kettle. Marilyn: Larry, that is so bad! Why are you like that? Larry: I just like things neat. When Judy and I were together things were messy, but that was okay. Now she is gone and it is just me, I like things tidy and that’s how it is. Marilyn: When we were kids, Mother (bless her wherever she is [looking down]) made Marlys and me clean the house top to bottom every Saturday and I vowed when I had my own house I would never clean again. Bob: And she never has. Marilyn: He does it for me when it gets too deep. Bob: She puts the mail on the chopping board and when the pile gets too high, it goes on the toaster. Waitress: Have you all decided what you would like to order? And will you have separate bills? Marilyn: We will have the tab. Jean: No, we will. You paid last year. Marilyn: No, I said we will have it, and I always get what I want. Philip: I’ll have the country special, hashed browns with sausage links and the eggs sunny side up. Waitress: What kind of toast to do want? Philip: Rye Waitress: We don’t do rye. Philip: What do you do? Waitress: We have white, wheat, sour dough, bagels, and English muffins. Philip: I’ll have wheat. Grace: Do you do senior portions? Waitress: No, we don’t. Grace: I’d like an omelette, but I can’t eat 3 egss. Can you do a 2 egg one? Waitress: I will see what we can do. Larry: I’ll have the country special too, with links, eggs over easy and wheat. Waitress (going towards Bob): And you sir? Marilyn: Come over here and ask her next (pointing to Jean). They are our guests. They should be served first. Waitress comes over to Jean, looking somewhat flustered, but knows who she has to please if she wants a big tip. Jean: I’ll have the country special too, patties, eggs over easy and wheat toast. Marilyn: You are all so boring. Jean: We don’t get good breakfasts like this in England. Marilyn: I would like waffles. Waitress: We don’t do waffles. Marilyn: (annoyed) They do waffles at Lennie’s across the road. Maybe we should go there. Okay then, I’ll have pancakes and scrambled eggs and orange juice. Bob: I’ll just have fried eggs, sunny side up, and white toast and orange juice. Philip: I’ll have orange juice too. Waitress: More coffee for anyone? Jean: Yes please. Marilyn: I’ve brought these pictures of our granddaughter, Elsie Marie. She is almost four and she is so cute. Jean: (looking at the pictures) She is very cute. Marilyn: I don’t know what my life was like before she was born. I used to think boys were better and was pleased when we only had Mark. But now that I know how much fun little girls are, I wish I’d done it all differently. Elsie Marie is taking dancing lessons now and they had their performance last week, and we went to see it. She really enjoys her dancing and she was looking forward to it. She has lots of little fancy dresses and shoes and she practiced all the time at home and at our house. But then when it came time for the performance, she said she wouldn’t go on stage. She just sat down and refused to budge. The teacher begged her and begged her, and in the end, she told her to peep through the curtain and see that her big sister was out in the audience waiting to see her. So that finally got her up and when the curtains were opened and all the other children danced out in a line holding hands, she went out into the corner on her own and did all the dances, but only on her own, not with anybody else. The lady sitting next to me said, “I have never seen a child like that before. She certainly has a mind of her own.” Bob: I wonder who she gets that from. Jean: I just happened to bring some pictures of our granddaughters too. Marilyn: (quick scan and passes them to Bob) Aren’t they sweet. Look Bob, aren’t they sweet? Do you know last week, Bob was sick so we told Elsie Marie that she couldn’t come over. But before long there she was knocking on the door. I explainined that Papa (that is what she calls Bob) was sick. “Oh is Papa pooping all over?” she said. Embarrassment from all assembled, which was just what Marilyn had wanted for an effect, so she repeated it all for emphasis. Jean: Marilyn, I think I am going to write a story about you. Philip: Jean is an author now, you know, Marilyn. She has a book being published on the internet. Marilyn: We don’t do the internet. I find a phone hard enough to work. Philip: Well we could send you a regular paper copy. Marilyn: If you do a book about me, don’t give it a copy to Larry. He will just put it away in the closet. And make sure it has an asbestos cover, because then he can’t burn it either. Breakfast arrives and all quiet while everyone gets busy with their food. Jean: Marilyn, you have recovered so well from your second stoke. Last year when we were here and you were almost over your first, you had just started your new job, and then it happened, didn’t it? Marilyn: Yes, it was just after Memorial Day. I could feel the stroke coming on and I said, “God, you can take my arms and my legs, but you had better lay off of my mouth.” Philip: And he answered your prayer. Marilyn: I had a problem with my eyes not looking straight for awhile, but that is more or less fixed now. The doctor I was going to work for before called the other day and said anytime I want to go back to work I can. But I don’t think I will now. Grace: Bob, I forgot to bring something for you. Bob does my accounts you know, and has my power of attorney. If it wasn’t for Bob, I would be in a nursing home. He said he would just keep paying the rent on my apartment for one more month, and how glad I am that he did that. I was so depressed last year I didn’t think I could cope, and now I am so glad that he knew what I needed better than I did. Bob: I’ll come over and get it later. Marilyn: Bob would do anything for Grace. All she has to do is call and he rushes over there. I don’t know why he doesn’t just move in with her. Grace: That would be fine with me if he did. Marilyn: It’s our anniversary tomorrow. Forty two years we’ve been married. Somebody asked Bob the other day how many happy years we had had together and he said two. “What do you mean,” I said, “we have been married forty two years.” “No,” he replied, “she said happy years.” Jean: I remember your wedding. Marilyn: I remember yours too. Waitress: Can I get you folks anything else? (Looking at Grace who hadn’t eaten very much of her huge omelette) Can I get you a box for that? Grace: No, that’s fine really. Everybody, not quite together: No, we’re fine. Bob: I’ll get the check. Waitress, with a nervous look at Marilyn to make sure this is all right with her, produces the bill straight away. It almost seemed like she was anxious to get rid of the party. Bob goes off to the cashier to pay it. Larry: Well it’s about time we hit the road. We have 385 miles to cover and another visit to make with Jean’s Aunt Leona. Marilyn: We’ll take Grace home, so you can get right off. Well, it sure has been fun seeing you. And next time you come, come at a decent hour. I don’t want to do any more breakfasts at 8.30. Okay? All get up and move towards the door. Marilyn gets the girl at the desk to come and take a picture. Hugs all around. The End.
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