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By pure_heartofmine
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06 July 2006 |
so this piece i wrote when i was trying to figure out how to get over some pretty strongs feelings for someone. a lot of the times my rambles help me realize something i was missing which is why i added the qoute at the end. something i said.
so love it, hate it, think about it. whatever thoguhts you may have, just post them. thanks!!! im always happy for your thoughts!!!
Jillian In life we tend to linger to long on one thing or another, not realizing that the longer we linger the more painful that sweet memory becomes. We lose focus on our reality and morals. We lose ourselves, hiding ourselves behind a mask, drowning ourselves in our misery. Not realizing that the happier we pretend to be the worse we get. We forget what we loved and cherished. Allowing ourselves to abandon all hope and faith. letting ourselves forget true feelings of happiness. how then to we get rid of these feelings? substitute it with something else, with... someone else? no. because even doing that we are only showing our mask to the world. I guess we must face the fear of worse to come. bring ourselves back to the reality smile because it happened not because it was over. but even if we learn to do this, what is now behind this mask. is it our true selves, or have we buried ourselves deeper. have we put a mask over a mask, so certain no one can see? what is this fear we all hold onto dear life for? A friend of mine told me today that he was afraid of heights, but loved roller coasters loved the feeling of falling, the adrenaline. Maybe in some way it’s the same concept. The fear of being oneself is great and a challenge but the rush of discovering yourself and having the courage to do it is worth having the fear.
Now the true question is how to move on. I think I started to go on about that. but it is hard to get over it because what you once loved is all that you are now, maybe that is why we linger so long because we cant remember what else there is. And so when we finally strip away that last love that last amazing memory what's left in us? A man full of a memory that was but never will be again? How do we know who we are when all we were, was them? How do we get over what’s lost while maintaining who we are? The answer: we can't. What we were is in the past, we are no longer those people. We are now ourselves whether we realize it or not. And being alone and being ourselves are our worst fears. For who will understand who we are if we don’t have that someone, that cherished memory to bring you out? We linger on too many questions trying to find an answer when the answer has always been within. we know the answer to all our questions we just ignore them hoping the answer will change because you know in this type of situation we would prefer to be lost and alone in a cherished memory them to even begin moving forward on our own.
"And suddenly reality hits me. And strangely... I’m okay with it"
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Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3445 comments posted) 6th July 2006 | I'm not sure I agree with all of it but it was an interesting and thought provoking piece and well argued. I noticed at the end the "we" changed to "I"
I suppose we all have our own personal philosophy and often assume it is shared. But it did make me think while reading which was the purpose of the exercise
Well done
BBS | I really liked this
Written by amy456 (25 comments posted) 6th July 2006 | | This was really deep and interesting, and goes to the heart of one of the most interesting and impossible questions: who we really are. I am 18 years old and at a stage in my life where I am trying to find my identity. Each person has so many different sides to them and even the most simple person is so complex, we wear so many different masks that in the end we don't know who we are any more. I loved this. |
Written by steve_turner (21 comments posted) 8th July 2006 | this reads like a philosophy major showing his parents what he's learned as he waits for them to die...
i would have been impressed had you chosen less preachy rhetoric and spilled it from uranus.
grit your teeth and tell us "why" instead of "what."  | Its not about the why!!!!
Written by johniebg (553 comments posted) 18th August 2006 | I suppose everyone has a right to an opinion but I have read steve_truners stuff. Reading yours touched me emotionally where turners is like looking at an abstract painting in a gallery, its a feast for the eyes but you dont quite get the whole.
Your only going to ask 'why' when reading this if you havent lived it, and for that you either took a different path or still have your eyes closed.
Personally the worst of the problem described is that you have been defined by the 'couple' and have lost your own identity, struggled to be yourself because you are told you are part of a whole. To truly find out who you are can only be accomplished by being you. That is probably not to lose yourself in another relationship but to look about you, Who are you? what do you believe in? Embracing that part of you that is inevitably inherited from your parents(very hard admittedly), whether through nature or nurture. What are your spiritual feelings, losing yourself to a god only accomplishes what a relationship does, it doesnt define you, it encompasses you.
The questions you pose I have deliberated at length on, I wrote three essays on 'Who Am I?'which can be got from my profile, the first two have 'who am i' in the title the last is called 'deconstructing the perfect day'. I hope they resonate if you chose to read them. | =)
Written by B.D. (82 comments posted) 5th January 2007 | Your last sentence & quote, I think, ends it with a bang & that's awesome that you can do that. I love how you just started off basically talking to the reader, like people who think out-loud do, even in the company of others...you know what I mean?
While we're talking about quotes, though, here's one I found that I like & it might be relevant: 'never make someone your everything, because when they're gone, you're left with nothing.' Just an idea.
Best wishes,
B.
| I forgot to add...
Written by B.D. (82 comments posted) 5th January 2007 | | I also love that it covers & says so much but it so short. Sure, you're sorta "rambling" but you know just when to stop instead of going on & making the reader bored. |
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