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Poetry
Hospital
By maipenrai
09 July 2006
Memories of Kosova.

Pristine Hospital moans with land mine legs
broken branches bearing no cross,
the dispossed dream of
devastation whilst
weary nurses weep
giving birth to the days end
fatigue feeding the acceptence
that sobbing shadows whisper
time is devouring the relief
they know nothing of peace.

only the dead know peace
exhume their pale corpse's
breathe life back into them
listen
as decayed lips speak
through mouths filled with dirt
only then
will the finger bones of my brothers grasp
the black wind and shake the dove
from the shoulders of the sky,
with empty shoes and
veins bleeding a white rain
only then will
the dead bring peace
only the dead know peace.

Reviews

Written by jsyingling (31 comments posted) 9th July 2006
Very impressive and intense piece of poetry. I love the alliteration and places, as well as the ending. The linebreaks add to the intensity and help slow down the poem in an extremely effective manner. 
 
My favorite lines (favorite because of the emotional impact) are "thorugh mouths filled with dirt" and the last two. I'm a little confused about the big space in the middle of the poem. I don't see any content subject change or any different direction the poem takes, so don't understand its purpose. 
 
Other than that, a really effective memoir. Is it from personal experience? 
 
j.
thanks
Written by maipenrai (783 comments posted) 9th July 2006
Hi and thank you for your comments and for coming back on this. 
 
yes it is an personal experience,i work in Aid and sspent a year in Kosova helping to set up a EMS Ambulence Service. 
 
Again Thanks 
Bernie
Powerful
Written by Leo (573 comments posted) 10th July 2006
You create a piece of writing that hits hard on the way in and says with the reader. 
 
thank you
thanks
Written by maipenrai (783 comments posted) 10th July 2006
Thanks Les for your comments and for taking the time. 
 
Bernie

Written by MikeMorris (106 comments posted) 10th July 2006
I'll be honest and admit I found the first stanza difficult. I think the second stanza has great skill and impact and could stand on its own. A very powerful piece, many thanks. 
Mike
thanks
Written by maipenrai (783 comments posted) 10th July 2006
thanks Mike for your comments and for taking the time/ 
 
for interest,there are a couple of pieces i put on here last year that maybe of interest to you. 
 
Children,Sweets and Suicide Bombers,25 july 05 
 
Robert 5 june 05
Chilling
Written by mishmish (389 comments posted) 31st July 2006
The reality of the experience surges forth in this brilliant poem. The reader knows you've been there, seen this. The pain is in every word, every image. 
 
The lines... 
only then 
will the finger bones of my brothers grasp 
the black wind and shake the dove 
from the shoulders of the sky, 
 
scream out at me, saying 'how many have to die, before peace is finally declared'. This is a shattering poem, one that touches your soul. 
 
You are really quite a writer! 
 
With best wishes 
 
mishmish
thanks
Written by maipenrai (783 comments posted) 1st August 2006
mishmash for your very kind comments 
Bernie

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