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Great Writing - Home > Extended > Confessions of a site secretary - part 2(b)
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Extended Work
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| Confessions of a site secretary - part 2(b) | |
| By teddy | ||||||||
| 01 August 2006 | ||||||||
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Again, I would be really grateful if you let me know what you think about this bit. Thanks. On Wednesday afternoon I was sitting down at my paper cluttered desk, squeezing my brains trying to write a report that Mark needs to send to the Head Office every month. Basically, it is the same crap you have to put down every single time but presented in different ways so it won’t look like copied from one month to another.And this is where the brain storming starts: now, how can I re-phrase this bit so it looks fresh and different from the ones I wrote previously? You can only do it so many times, you know. And on that particular afternoon I felt like I was really lacking inspiration. Anyway, I was heavily concentrating as the report had to be ready by the following morning when I heard a knock in the door. ‘Now, who the hell is it… again?’ I must say that that office seems more like a train station than anything else, with a continuous movement of people in and out. Mark himself comes and goes about fifty times a day… at least. Sometimes I don’t really mind the traffic but there are times when it could get quite irritating. Like today, for example. ‘Come iiiin!’ I shouted without bothering to turn around - my back faces the door – thinking that it was most probably one of the lads coming to pick up the storeroom key. The door opened and I heard a somehow known but much unexpected ‘Hi, Adi.’ I turned around and there were Paul Harold and this other guy, both smiling sympathetically. Well, at least this was how it looked like. ‘Great,’ I thought, ‘they must think I’m nuts shouting that bloody loud. What on earth is he doing here anyway?’ ‘Adi, this is George Hamilton, he works for Harolds as well. George is, in fact, the architect in charge of this project. ‘Hiya.’ I grinned at George wondering what the hell all that had to do with me. The guy reminded me of someone and I couldn’t quite figure out of whom, which was rather annoying. ‘Is Mark around?’ Paul asked. ‘No, I’m afraid he’s out on site.’ I lied knowing that Mark was long gone home. One of his kids needed picking up from school because his wife’s car had broken down while picking up the others. ‘Can I help you at all? I quickly asked to cover the blush covering my face. I am not a good liar and I can get caught quite easily. But if I really had to then I would lie. Especially to cover for Mark. He is very good to me I must say. ‘Perhaps you could. We will have some drawings delivered Friday morning, there are actually quite few. I just wanted to make sure that they get taken upstairs, to Beaurex office. I was told that Mark is the person that I need to speak with about this.’ ‘That wouldn’t be a problem. I’ll have a word with Ben, our security supervisor, he’ll take care of it.’ I smiled reassuringly. ‘Brilliant. Thank you very much.’ he gratefully returned the smile. ‘Oh, there is one more thing,’ he carried on, ‘we’re having a night out on Friday at our local pub, next to our offices, and I thought you and Mark would like to join us. There are few other people from this site coming as well.’ ‘Oh no, not another drink!’ I moaned silently, ‘not with you lot anyway.’ This would’ve been all I’d needed, being stuck in an unfamiliar pub on a Friday night with lots of poxy strangers around. No, thanks! ‘I don’t know, I will ask Mark if he wants to go.’ ‘Well, think about it. I would really like you to be there.’ ‘Ok, thanks.’ After they left, I remembered: George looked like a younger and definitely fitter version of Edward Fox, the actor. Thanks God for that, that would’ve bothered me all day if I hadn’t figured it out. Yesterday I got to the office earlier then usual. The weather is warming up and I decided that it was time to get my skirts out of the wardrobe. ‘Oh, I didn’t know you’ve got legs.’ Mark teased me when I got into the office. ‘D’you want to see the rest of them?’ I teased him back. ‘Yeah, I should be so lucky.’ he laughed. It was Friday and I was definitely not in a working mood. Still, I knew I had quite a lot of paperwork to finish. ‘Are you going to the pub tonight?’ Mark asked me around midday. ‘You mean with that lot, the architects and all that?’ ‘Yeah.’ ‘Nah, I think I’ll give it a miss. You?’ ‘No, I can’t, I’m taking the wife and the kids out tonight. Is your mate, Louise, going?’ ‘Yeah, I think so.’ ‘Well, why don’t you go then? It might be fun. I mean, it’s Friday, you should go out and enjoy yourself.’ ‘Yeah, thanks Mark, very kind of you but I can make up my own mind.’ my thoughts rebelled. I don’t like people telling me what to do especially with my personal life. ‘Nah, it’s not really my scene.’ Mark left about five. ‘Adi, I’m going. Don’t stay too late.’ ‘Ok, I won’t. I have some stuff to finish and then I’ll go.’ ‘Oh, fuck it, it can wait until Monday, can’t it?’ ‘Yeah, ok.’ I said. ‘Now bugger off and leave me alone.’ I ordered him silently. Half past five and I was still in the office trying to finish the last few bits of paperwork. It was very quiet. Well, on a Friday afternoon the site gets usually deserted. Everyone buggers off either home or to the pub. Through the open door, I heard Ben, the security supervisor, talking to someone in the reception area and then steps approaching the office. I wondered who could’ve been, I didn’t think that was anyone else left on site apart from the security staff and me. I turned around. Surprise, surprise, it was Paul Harold again. ‘Now, what does he want?’ I wondered. ‘I bet something happened to his drawings this morning.’ ‘Hi.’ he greeted me. ‘Hiya.’ I replied waiting for him to start complaining. ‘I’m on a mission.’ he proved me wrong. ‘To take you to the pub.’ ‘Yeah, right. As someone would really care if I’ll go or not.’ ‘I’m afraid I can’t go. I still have some work to do.’ I tried to excuse my way out of it. ‘I’m sure it is not something that can’t wait until Monday.’ he insisted. Now, I really hate when people try to force me into something that I do not want to do. How was I gonna get rid of him? ‘Please, do come.’ he carried on. I looked at him and I could see his eyes demanding not asking. ’How can someone possibly have eyes like that?’ they amazed me once again. ‘Your friend, Louise, will be there.’ ‘Oh, I see.’ I thought, ‘if you thing that you can get to Louise through me then you’ve got another thing coming,’ Nah, that didn’t make sense. He could’ve had Louise eating out of his hand without my help. Then, what on earth was he playing at? Another look at him made me decide. The determined expression on his face was telling me that he wasn’t gonna give up. ‘Ok, give me two minutes, please.’ I surrendered really hating myself for not being able to tell him to sod off and leave me alone. I mean, under any other circumstances, I would’ve been more than flattered by the attention but, in this case, I had a strange feeling that something wasn’t quite right. Five minutes later and we were out watching the usually quiet now jam packed noisy road. ‘Hmmm, there must’ve been an accident somewhere.’ Paul said. ‘Even if we manage to get a cab it will take us hours to get there. How about catching a train?’ ‘That’s fine by me, mate. I use it every day’ I thought. ‘No too sure about you though.’ He didn’t exactly look the sort of person familiar with the misery of the London’s public transport, especially on a Friday afternoon. Five minutes on and we were inside the tube station. Before I had a chance to let him know that, as a regular tube commuter, I obviously already had a travel card, he bought two tickets from the vending machine. ‘Great,’ I thought, ‘now I owe him three quid. Shall I offer him the money? Nah, I don’t think he will take them. Plus, I didn’t bloody ask him to buy me a ticket in the first place.’ He put one of them through the card reader and let me go first through the turnstile. As we got on the platform the train was just pulling in. We jumped into one of the quite busy carriages. And there we were, facing each other, arms hanging and hands clenching the safety rail above our heads. Paul was quiet and I didn’t feel too talkative either. His was looking at me, which made me feel a bit awkward. My eyes started counting the stops on the map displayed on the opposite wall: one, two, three… This was when I realised that I didn’t even know where we supposed to get off. Right between two stops the train broke brusquely. ‘Idiot!’ I quietly complimented the driver, while I was involuntary moving backwards. I was just about to throw a quick ‘Sorry!’ to the guy behind me when I felt a firm arm around my waist pulling me back to my initial upright position. ‘Steady!’ Paul smiled while I was gratefully mumbling a ‘Thank you!’ Then something strange happened: once saved I expected Paul’s hand to move off my back and returned into its owner’s pocket. But it didn’t. I could feel it, burning sensation just above my bottom. ‘Great,’ I thought looking around embarrassed, ‘what’s he playing at?’ Somehow though, it felt nice. And safe. So my arm let go the safety rail. ‘Now hold me if this make you feel happy.’ my eyes looked at him impertinently. A smartly dressed middle age woman was watching us in a ‘ what a nice couple’ kind of way. ‘Don’t even go there!’ I grinned at her. I caught a moment when Paul wasn’t looking and I started examining him. An amusing thought crossed my mind: he wasn’t blending into the picture at all. He looked more like he just descended from a bloody fashion magazine! His shirt only was probably worth more than all my personal belongings. As about his watch, you could’ve probably got the whole carriage in exchange for it. Hold on, perhaps the whole bloody train! Louise was right, I decided, he was definitely handsome. But in a different kind of way. He had very masculine, powerful features, especially his amazing eyes. I didn’t think that there would be many people that could stand up to them. And he looked quite fit. And tanned, like someone who spends lots of time outdoors. ‘I bet he plays some kind of sports.’ I thought. I tried to figure out how old he was. In his thirties I guessed. Early thirties, mid thirties I couldn’t really decide. I noticed that his very short hair was getting grey, but that kind of suited him actually. An uneasy feeling started bothering me again: what the hell did he want from me? Was this some kind of sick game he was trying to play? I mean, ok, I might be pretty but, hey, I know my limits. And I would never really expect someone like Paul Harold to pay me any attention. And I’m not talking only about physical aspect here, I’m actually talking about everything. Paul moved his eyes back to me. Embarrassed, I started counting the stops on the map in front of me again. The train pulled puffing into the station. ‘There we are.’ Paul announced me. We got off and headed for the exit. On the escalator, I swear I could feel his eyes examining my behind. Bloody men! Out of the station and there was another shock: without even asking he grabbed my hand. ‘What the fuck do you think you’re doing?’ I went into a rage. Inside my head, of course, ‘cos, somehow, I didn’t really have the guts to say that straight to his face. I mean, com’on, I only knew him five minutes and… I could’ve had a boyfriend, I could’ve been ...a lesbian for heaven’s sake, maybe I might have not even liked him …you don’t hold hands with someone just like that… ’You’re such an idiot, girl.’ I lamented getting really upset with myself. Not that it made much difference. ‘Cos there I was, following him, like a little puppy. A gentle pat on my head and I would’ve probably started woofing. ‘I hope you will like the pub.’ Paul said while leading me along the tall office blocks that seemed to have invaded the area. ‘Yeah, right, a pub is a bloody pub.’ I thought while smiling an ‘I’m sure I will.’ Well, it wasn’t exactly only a pub, it was a posh one. When we entered it and I saw the people that it was filled with I felt like bloody Cinderella at the ball but still wearing her scruffy dress. ‘Can I get you a drink?’ Paul asked me. With the risk of being rude I had to refuse. ‘No, thanks, not at the moment. I have to go and say hello to all the others.’ I said noticing familiar faces in the crowd. Luckily, they didn’t see me. The last thing I wanted was Louise to see me with him again. ‘Ok, I’ll see you around.’ Paul smiled. ‘Hey, Adi, I didn’t think you’ll come.’ Louise said when she saw me. ‘Oh well, I thought I’ll surprise you.’ I think she was tipsy already. One of the guys there offered me a drink. ‘Where’s Mark?’ someone asked. ‘He’s taking his misses and kids out for dinner tonight.’ ‘How many kids has he got? I heard he’s been married three times.’ ‘I don’t know, about six.’ I guessed. ‘Fucking hell, few more and he could’ve had his own football team.’ Everyone laughed. Paul came around a bit later and got us drinks. He chatted to us for a while, making sure that everyone was alright. I panicked a bit thinking that he might mention about him bringing me there. Luckily, he didn’t. I think he knew I didn’t want the others to know. I had already two glasses of wine and I was feeling quite jolly actually. Everyone was in a good mood and the jokes and laughs were flowing around. The only one who didn’t seem to enjoy herself too much was Louise. ‘Look at that idiot’ she said to me, ‘he thinks he is it. ...you think he’s trying to make me jealous?’ I turned around to see the object of her criticism. Of course, it was Paul. He was chatting to a quite good-looking well-dressed woman, not far from where we were. Before I managed to turn my head, our eyes intersected. ‘You idiot,’ I turned back to Louise, ‘why did you made me look at him? He saw me and now he knows we’re talking about him.’ ‘And? Do I look like I care?’ Louise was getting quite stroppy. ‘No, you don’t.’ I looked outside. It was getting dark.’ ‘Shit, I forgot to phone up Tina to let her know that I’ll be late.’ I remembered. ‘Louise, I’m going outside to make a phone call.’ I said. ‘Ok, don’t be too long.’ I was talking to Tina, with my back leaning against the pub’s brick wall when I heard steps and then someone stopping in front of me. I lifted my eyes and there was Paul. ‘Listen, Tina, I have to go now. I’ll call you again when I’ll leave.’ What on earth was he doing there? ‘Are you ok? he asked. I nodded a ‘yes’. He came very close and his hand moved towards my face and started stroking it. Then he moved it at the back of my head, gently grabbing my hair, leaned over and I felt his lips covering mine. ‘For God sake, what is he doing?’ my mind revolted while my mouth involuntary opened under his inquisitive one. ‘This cannot be real.’ my brain kept repeating while the rest of my body was actually enjoying his exploring hands. Well, thinking that, up until that moment, it had been months since I’d been touched last, I couldn’t even blame myself. I could feel him growing hard against me and I felt a tingling feeling in my tummy and my knickers getting wet. ‘Come with me.’ he took my hand leading me towards the back of the building. And again, I was just following him without a single muscle in my body being able to oppose. At the back of the pub there was a car park, a small one. Not that I could see much anyway as it was already quite dark. He dragged me into a niche where he pinned me against the wall and started kissing me again. And then I felt his hands lifting my skirt and then me off the ground. ‘We can’t, someone might…’ ‘Sshhhh, trust me…’ he whispered in my ear. ‘Oh, my God, I’m just about to have sex with a complete stranger in a car park ….I’m just about to have sex …’ was the last rational thing my mind was able to articulate. When I returned to the real world and my feet back on the solid soil I felt my legs trembling. ‘Lets go back inside.’ Paul said. He took me to a side entrance. I walked straight to the toilets avoiding the crowd. In there, I started cleaning myself up. I looked in the mirror pulling a nearly suicidal face. ‘You’re such a fucking idiot, Adi.’ the reflection was telling me. ‘You’ve just managed to have unprotected sex with someone you hardly know. How on earth could you let this happen?’ My only consolation was that I knew Paul didn’t, you know, …finish. So, at least, there were no worries that I could posibly get pregnant or anything like that. That would’ve been the most ironic thing ever. He couldn’t have possibly been that stupid I thought. Not him. However, I have to be honest and say that that was one of the best shags I’ve ever had. Well, it might have something to do with the fact that, up until now, I hadn’t had one in months. When I got back inside Louise went into one: ‘Where on earth have you been, woman?’ ‘Outside, talking to Tina on the phone.’ I lied. ‘For half an hour?’ It couldn’t have been that long I thought but I didn’t really feel like arguing. I was in desperate need of a drink. As if he guessed, Glenn ordered me a glass of wine. ‘Cheers, Glenn.’ ‘Fucking hell, you’re thirsty, girl!’ he said watching the glass emptying quickly. Just metres away Paul was chatting with few of his people. One of them was the guy I met earlier this week, the Edward Fox look alike. The pretty woman that Paul was talking to earlier was there as well. ‘Is she gonna be next?’ I wondered. Paul looked like nothing at all had happened. He was laughing, enjoying himself. Idiot! ‘Here, Adi, have another one.’ someone offered me another drink. I could feel that I was getting drunk but at that particular moment in time I couldn’t care less. ‘He probably thinks I’m a bloody tart. And I can't really blame him. And I bet by Monday afternoon the whole fucking site will know that I let him shag me.’ I kept torturing my brain. Another half glass of wine determined me to forget about the whole thing and start enjoying myself. Glenn was telling me dirty jokes and, seeing me loudly laughing and being merry, he probably thought it might be his lucky night. He kept putting his arm around me. Well, put it like this, I wasn’t really THAT drunk. However, after a while I realised that, if I had another sip of the drink held in my hand, I would be sick all over the place. Whops, time to go I said to myself. I mean, no matter what, I really wanted to get home that night. Before leaving, I threw another quick look at Paul. He was still there, with the same people, still looking happy. ‘Fuck him!’ I thought. ‘Bye, guys!’ I shouted while grabbing my bag. ‘Adi, you sure you’ll be alright?’ someone asked concerned. I must’ve looked quite drunk. ‘Course I will, I’m a big girl, you know?’ I bragged off and then left. I was walking along the quiet street, trying to find my way to the tube station, not that I had a clue were I was anyway, when I heard my name called: ‘Adi!’ It was Paul. ‘I’ll take you home.’ he said. ‘I can manage on my own, thank you very much.’ I mumbled. He didn’t hear me or pretended he didn’t. He stopped a cab and I had no choice than to jump in it. When I woke up this morning I thought I’ve died and woken up in heaven. Everything around the room looked so different,…very luxurious, not something that my eyes have been used to face first thing they open in the morning. ‘Ouch’ a sharp pain that my head experimented when I tried to move it reminded me that I was still very much alive. ‘Where the hell am I?’ I tried to recollect last night’s events. The last thing I could actually remember was me standing by one side of the road emptying the whole content of my stomach in a not very graceful manner. And Paul asking me if I was alright. ‘Yes, just stay where you are… please…., two minutes and I’ll be fine.’ I mean, no matter how drunk, I still had some pride left in me. Up to that moment. God knows what happened after. ‘Cos I didn’t. Somehow. I managed to dragged myself out of the sofa I was lying on. An appetising aroma of freshly brewed coffee was coming through the opened door. I tried to find where the smell was coming from and I walked into a large, stylish kitchen where Paul was sitting down at the massive table in the middle, reading a newspaper. ‘Hi.’ he turned around when heard me. ‘Did you sleep well?’ ‘Yes, thanks.’ I replied aware that the hand on my forehead and the hangover tired face were contradicting me. ‘Where am I?’ ‘I’m sorry, you fell asleep in the cab last night. I tried to wake you up but you were very tired. I didn’t know where you live so I brought to mines….hope you don’t mind.’ Oh God, how much more embarrassment can I get myself into? ‘Oh, thank you, I think I had a bit too much too drink last night, I’m really sorry…’ ‘Don’t be.’ he smiled comfortingly. ‘Take these, they’ll make you feel better.’ he handed me two tablets and a glass of water. ‘I…can I use your bathroom?’ I asked. I was in a desperate need of a shower. ‘Of course, please.’ he said. ‘You’ll find everything you’ll need in there.’ he showed me where the bathroom was. ‘Thank you.’ The whole place looked like a palace compared with Tina’s two bedroom terrace house in Walthamstow. Well, the place was a palace compared to everyone’s house. Everyone that I knew, of course. After I had the shower I walked back downstairs. ‘Thanks for everything.’ I said to Paul, ‘I need to go now. My auntie, Tina, is probably worried sick not knowing where I am.’ ‘No, she phoned you last night, after we got here, and you talked to her.’ ‘Did I? And what did I tell her?’ I asked not being able to remember a single thing. ‘That you are staying with a friend. So she must be ok.’ Thanks God for that! ‘Stay and have some breakfast. And I’ll call you a cab.’ I was just about to refuse but the grumbling noises in my stomach made me change my mind. ‘Toast? Cereals? Or both?’ Paul asked. ‘Toast, thanks.’ ‘Tea or coffee?’ ‘Coffee, please. Black. No sugar.’ It was weird to see Paul in his own house. Making me breakfast. He looked different too in jeans and t-shirt. A bit more accessible I thought. While I was munching my toast he called for a cab. ‘Did you enjoy it last night?’ he asked after putting the phone down. He was smiling. Now, that was a tricky question. What exactly was he referring to? The night out itself? Or the shag? ‘Yes, thanks.’ I chose to ignore any possible confusion or mocking intention. We heard the beep of a horn noising in front of the house. It was my cab. ‘Finish your breakfast. I’ll ask the driver to wait few minutes.’ Paul said. ‘Great,’ I thought wondering if my last week wages will be enough to cover the taxi’s fee. When Paul came back I was sipping the last few mouthfuls of coffee. ‘I’m ready. I’m sorry for all the trouble I caused you. And thanks again for everything,’ ‘Don’t be silly. It’s been my pleasure.’ Yeah, I’m sure it has! In the cab, on the way home, I tried to analyse the situation. How bad it was. Will I be able to face the world again after last night? I wasn’t too sure about that. What I was 100% positive of was that I could not let anyone know about what happened in that car park. How could I possibly tell someone? What I could not understand at all was why it happened. Paul wasn’t exactly the type of guy lacking females’ attention. Quite the opposite I would say. Only last week Louise was ready to offer herself to him without hesitation. Maybe she was right, maybe he was up for a bit of fun…rough one! Then why didn’t he shag her? She had much more to offer than me, that’s for sure. At that moment an awkward thought crossed my mind. What if he did? Nah, she would’ve told me. Well, are you going to tell her about it? Are you going to tell anyone about it? Nope. Then why should’ve she? Shit! I could see then what he was up to. He was a fucking womaniser. Trying to get into every single woman’s knickers. Every woman that he'd come across. And he was doing very well I must say. That moment I really hated myself. And him. ‘Here we are, miss.’ I heard the driver’s voice. The cab was stopped in front of the house. ‘Thanks, how much do I owe you?’ I asked him thinking that I would probably have to go inside and fetch more cash. ‘Nothing, miss. It’s been paid for already.’ ‘Oh ok.’ I said unpleasantly surprised. Was that Paul’s way of saying thanks for the shag? Yeah, most probably. Once in the house, I walked straight into the kitchen. On the table there was a note from Tina telling me that they’re gone out shopping. I came upstairs into my bedroom and changed my clothes. And at this particular moment in time all I want is to lie down on the bed and never wake up again …this miserable I feel.
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