"Do you want a drink? Coffee or anything Gerry?" asked Fred, as he led Father Gerard up the back stairs of the Leg of Lamb pub.

"Oi was t'inkin' you moight have somet'ing a little stronger Frederick, some'ting to quench me little t'irst" the holy Father smiled, gently rubbing his chest. Fred too smiled, and poured them both a large whisky from the half-bottle that sat on his coffee table. Fred invited the Reverend into his kitchen, where his newly delivered parcel sat on the table. The outer wrapping had already been opened by Fred, and so had the flaps.

"I must say Frederick" Father Gerard said between gulps of his whisky, "I cannot help feelin' a little excited at d t'ought of it. T'will be the best couple o'hundred quid we have spent, so it will".

"I think you might be right my friend. Now then, get a feast of this little beauty" Fred grinned, his hand dipping into the box and removing the contents....

Jenny climbed on her pushbike, and peddled off in the direction of the lake to meet up with Brook. The two had known each other since childhood, and had become firm friends. Brook never forgot how comforting Jenny had been during the aftermath of her parents unfortunate death, at the visiting fairground when they were still children. Over the following years, many a secret had been shared between the two, and Brook actually placed more trust in Jenny than her own twin sister Tanya.

"Hey, glad you came" Brook smiled as Jenny dismounted her bike and sat beside her friend.

"Hiya" smiled Jenny, "what you doing? Doodling again?" she asked. Brook had a tendency to sit sketching whenever something was on her mind, and Jenny had learned through experience that a lot could be read into Brook's sketches.

"Yeah. I left work a bit early and just feel so fresh and alive; thought I'd come sit up here for a bit." Brook explained, whilst still sketching away.

"Come on then, let's have a look.." Jenny said, peering over the shoulder of her mate. She slowly assessed the doodles on the various pages of Brooks pad.

"What we got here then....? A huge, impressive church steeple...; a large, upright solidly girthed tree....; an exceptionally long flower, complete with a couple of buds at the foot of the stem....forgive me if I'm out of order here, but I suspect you've been getting your nuts from somewhere Brook Rivers!" Jenny grinned, having deduced the fact from the numerous phallic symbols that adorned her sketch pad. Brook just smiled, a coy smile, though perhaps a hint of mischief hidden within.

"You jammy bugger!" A playful slap on the shoulder accompanied Jenny's comment.

"Who is it? It's Christopher innit? I know it is!" Again Brook just grinned. A hint of satisfaction now hidden within the smile. "I must admit you've done well there! I don't suppose you're up for a threesome...?"

Back at the pub, Father Gerard was admiring the life-size blow up doll Fred had pulled from the box. "Jesus son of Mary!" he exclaimed, "praise be, 'tis a stunning likeness. How in d' Father's name did yous manage to get yer grubby mitts on such a t'ing of beauty Frederick?" he smiled, in awe at the likeness the doll had to young Tanya Rivers. He took it from Fred and held it up in front of him, surveying it with a glint in his eye.

"Well, I found this website see, and all I did was take a few photo's of her, and sent them off. Then they made the doll! I think they have a couple of people who used to work for Madam Tussaud's on their books. All you do then is tell them how tall, what size tits etc, and they do the rest." Fred grinned, taking it back from the Father.

"Well waste ye time not dear boy, get the t'ing blown up so we can see what it looks like in real life." Gerry egged, keen to feast his eyes on the finished product. Fred fumbled around, until he found the valve which was located just above the crack of the dolls arse.

"Hello Tanya." Fred started talking to the doll. "Come and let uncle Fred breathe a bit of life into you my dear". Father Gerard, the horny holy man, stood rubbing his hands with excitement.  With a deep breath, Fred started to blow....

Tanya put the finishing touches to her Mann trap. Low cut top, push up bra, stilletto heels, and her favourite 'RAF' skirt. "Let's see if you can resist this little package!" she thought to herself. Her shortest mini-skirt had gotten the nickname 'RAF' skirt from the lads down the pub, due to the fact is was so short you could nearly see the 'cock-pit'. She headed downstairs and noticed her sister's cellphone was still on the sideboard. "She must have forgotten it!" Tanya smiled.  

She scrolled through the contacts. Under the 'C' section, she spotted what she was after. Many had commented how similar she and her sister sounded over the phone. Being twins, it wasn't a surprise to find they sounded alike. She called the number, which was answered in no time at all.

"Eyup love!"

"Hi, it's only me. Where are you?" Tanya replied, doing her best to immitate her sister accurately.

"I'm in the Post Office. What's happening then? Are we out tonight then? I've got a present for you"

"I can't tonight I'm afraid, I've got another date"

"Eh, what you on about? I thought that we wer....."

"Back off will you! Look, I like to spread it around OK? If you don't like it then that's tough! I'll call you in a day or so, OK?"

Tanya hung up. Quickly, she scuttled round to the Post Office, to put part II of her cunning plan into action....