The hard part of this particular day was Filipino.

Well, for the second quarter, we were taking up Ibong Adarna (Adarna Bird), Obra Maestra. It's a nice story and we were supposed to act it out as a group presentation. Being 46 girls in the class, we were supposed to have 7 groups. Three of which would have six members and four would have seven members.

Our teacher, who was also a class adviser, wanted volunteers for the groups.

People started calling out names.

Shite! I hate this part. The people in my class were too superficial and dumb that they can't take it in: VOLUNTEERS!

I didn't want to do it. There were lots of reasons why I didn't want to.

1. If I was a leader, my bloody members would rely on me to do everything. If it works out great, we share credit. If it fails, I get the saliva teachers spill on to talk to us about commitment. Damn.

2. I wanted to be with Lui Kerplunk! If I volunteer, the teacher would volunteer her, too, which wouldn't work out for any of us. This happened during reading class, puppet show leaders for book week.

3. I wanted someone to be responsible with me in the group. (In the class, there are only about nine who could effectively and efficiently lead a group. Those would be: me, Lui, Anya, Mikee, our class president, Claudine, an overly dedicated girl, Czari, a quiet, but nice girl, Marielle, my songmate, Millie, a small but terrible girl, and Ayn, a snob, but still, good. We were few, two of which I didn't like.)

Was that too much to ask?!?

See, I don't bloody hell want to!

Good enough, Claudine volunteered. Good for her. No one raised their hands after her. As in not a living soul.

I felt sorry for our teacher.

I exchanged a far off (we were like six meters apart) look with Lui. She volunteered.

That being done, I sighed. At least our teacher had another one. And, I could easily be in Lui's group later. Then, more and more did.

All that time, harsh whispers reached me from all over the classroom. All of which were calling my name, as if wanting me to volunteer myself.

I didn't want to! Can't they just get the point?

Eventually, after a few frustrating minutes -- was it only just a few minutes? -- we found the leaders.

Our teacher, now a bit red faced from persuading people to volunteer, told us to go to whoever we want as our leader. Naturally, I went for Lui. Anya went with me.

Since I cursed at a few people in the process of getting volunteers, we were only three.

The rest either didn't want any of the leaders (damn, why didn't they volunteer if they don't like the leaders?!?) or they wanted to stay with their quick-yapping friends (mostly consists of Bruha's).

They didn't want us, we didn't want them.

Anyway, after school, when we were hanging back at the classroom, Lui was almost in tears as she talked to me.

She wasn't really that emotional; it's just the stress. I know a lot about it. Damn you, I know. I'm the leader of currently four groups in different subjects and the set's going to get bigger tomorrow. I hate it when people just use you.

I told her that and she let the tears fall down. I understood perfectly. The stress was getting to both of us. Heck, I already have dark circles under my eyes at the age of 12 in just two weeks of classes.

"That's what they do." I told her. "They're going to do that to you until you curl up in a corner and die."

I remember her laughing bitterly at the comment. It was a bit exagerated, but mainly, it was true. They were too over abusive.

Now, as I eat my dinner, fried Tilapia (fish that I don't know the english of), I regret going to school this year. Like the last years, I get used. I wonder, you know, why do I even bother?