I get tired of hearing the same old things
'love thy neighbour' and 'peace for mankind'
'Cos you cannot ignore
The occasional war
Is the best crack a soldier can find
Riding in tanks and jumping from planes
Great adventures and fun escapades
Just think of the japes
All those lucky escapes
And chucking them live hand grenades
Donning your nice karki uniform
Dodging bullets, without making a sound
Storming into some village
For a quick rape & pillage
Before razing the place to the ground
The abandoned streets of a once busy town
As they flee to avoid all the shooting
You're above the law
As you search door to door
To make sure its safe to start looting
Then once you're done, it's homeward bound
And a role in society begs
You can proclaim nice and loud
'Yes I fought and I'm proud'
Though I wish I'd not lost both me legs
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I'm sorry but - - -
Written by Josie (2825 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
| If you have lost a son, a daughter, brother or sister, you might not view this in the same way. It's not really a subject to joke about, people's lives. |
Its
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
|
Its a subject which MUST be joked about.
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
If we don't laugh we'll cry. Dubbya's stormtroopers wander the world, killing with impunity, flagrantly disregarding the Geneva convention, human rights legislation etc.
Excellent Givitsum! Don't heed the would be censors, the taboo merchants.
Poor Josie is unwitting tool of state sponsored terrorism - trying to silence any dissent by using emotional blackmail. Can you do us a list Josie, of the subjects which we are not allowed to joke about? "Peoples lives" is a bit vague and err...covers everything really.
Oli |
Oh what a Lovely War...
Written by gerardconnolly (1186 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
A very apt and apposite lampoon Chris, to celebrate 9/11. Well done. I would willingly own up to this one myself.
As for the first response, I think I can truthfully say that I have rarely read a more stupid and sanctimonious piece of censurious humbug neigh on claptrap on this site for some time. I had to read it twice to make sure we were not being revisited by MangoMan. But on noticing the author I am not surprised. Anybody with an ounce of intelligence can spot a satire. Though I am not sure Enid Blyton ever wrote one. If you discount Noddy, of course.
I shall certainly add this to my School Assembly repertoire. Those who ignore History, as they say, are bound to repeat it. You and Talisker certainly pep up the Dead Poets Society.
Slan!
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Written by Fledermaus (3456 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
| As a protest against war it works well, and both the rhyme and the rithm seem to flow well, but I can understand the response of Josie. It's probably not a pleasant read for people whose relatives are serving in the armed forces. |
Watch your step
Written by Ed (14 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
Okay, obviously a subject to bring out extreme and emotional responses in people.
But just play nice in your discussions will ya? I don't mind disagreement and alternative viewpoints, but there's really no need for this personal nastiness. There are no prizes here for being the most cynical or world-weary. |
Soap Box
Written by Phil (6851 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
I can see where Josie's coming from - BUT that's absolutely why you should have written this. To be honest, I didn't see this as a jokey piece, satire yes, outright funny, no.
I liked the poem a great deal. The tone was perfect and it captured the extreme, but I'm sure - all too true reality of some 'soldiers.'
At the risk of sounding pretentious, the power of your poem comes from the very fact that many would dare not execute it for fear of offending.
I've read it a few times now and it improves every time.
Well done Givitsum - in fact - excellent.
All the best, Phil. |
Reflecting
Written by Gill21 (566 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
| I'm just going to say that this is wonderfully written. No more bad feelings should come out of this tragedy than already has done. It's about the writing. Well done. |
On quota
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3458 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
It was the late great Bill Hicks who said if he hadn't offended at 5% of his audience he would change his material. I sense a little heartfelt emotion poking through that cynical givitsum attiude and this was all the more powerful for it and the limerick the perfect vehicle to contrast the contents. You're getting quite profound,and satirical If you're not careful you'll have your Yorkshire visa revoked
cheers
BBS |
From Josie
Written by Josie (2825 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
| As I pointed out to Brian, who has written so well in the short stories - my husband has had to identify the body his younger brother, Brian, who died in a dreadful explosion in his 20s, after being kept alive for 4 days on morphine. 98% burns means that you are blackened through to your bones. It is sickening. It was a horror to us. I am not "poor" in any way when I say that I think that to many people it is completely distasteful to laugh at war. I'm sorry, but I'm entitled to my opinion without rudeness from others who are entitled to theirs. When you pass words to others, you are not writing on a blank sheet, and people will react according to their own experiences. Ours was very bad. No offence Givitsum - only trying to point out that everyone will not react in the same way to your subject. It was an emotive subject. |
Well..
Written by givitsum (651 comments posted) 11th September 2006 |
What can one say? Thanks for the gory details. And don't worry Josie you have in no way offended me. But as one person on this site taught me a long time ago, if everyone approves of what you're doing, you're doing summat wrong.
However, as others have said, certain subjects cannot be made taboo. That's just not how our World works. How many people who were sexually abused at school like being reminded how great school is?
My grandad fought in WWII. He came home with a nice shiny medal, he rode in a tank, and got to shoot Germans. He had a whale of a time. Still, each to their own.
Thanks to all that commented for.. er.. commenting.
Rgds
Givitsum |
No one wins....
Written by woody44 (777 comments posted) 12th September 2006 |
I think this is a great piece of thought-provoking poetry Chris. Ok we all have our views on this, but I think it should be read for what I think it is. A piece about the futility of war...hence the ending with the soldier minus his legs. That last line for me says it all. Brought quite a lump to my gnarled old throat my friend.
hapy writing
woody |
my two penn'orth .......
Written by Bagheera (683 comments posted) 12th September 2006 |
......... as usual, song titles/lyrics suggest themselves (which doesn't automatically meawn that someone else has already said "what needs saying" before, or has said it "better" in any way!!)
1) Eric Bogle: "The Band Played Waltzing Matilda"
part of verse 3 runs:
And when I woke up in me hospital bed
And saw what it had done, well, I wished I was dead.
Never knew there was worse things than dying.
For I'll go no more Waltzing Matilda
All around the green bush far and free,
To hump tent and pegs, a man needs both legs,
No more Waltzing Matilda for me.
2) Clancy Brothers (trad. Irish folk music):
"Johnny I hardly knew ye"
Melody: When Johnny comes Marching Home
one verse reads:
You haven't an arm, you haven't a leg, hoo-roo hoo-roo,
You haven't an arm, you haven't a leg, hoo-roo hoo-roo,
You haven't an arm, and you haven't a leg,
Your an eyeless, boneless, chickenless egg.
You'll have to be put with a bowl to beg.
Johnny, I hardly knew ye.
My favourite quote is from Wilfred Owen:
"My subject is War, and the Pity of War.
The Poetry is in the Pity"
And it's also true, as stated elsewhere: with certain unavoidable facts of life, the choice is to laugh or go mad. My opinion (for what it's worth) is that givitsum has once again hit a sensitive nail squarely on the head ... a bag full of mixed reactions is hardly surprising. Thanks for forcing us to think of this unfortunate and sad anniversary
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Written by brook_rivers (484 comments posted) 12th September 2006 |
I echo what BBS and Woody have already said. This has to be read as a satire to be appreciated and for me the last line says it all. 'oh what a lovely war' does spring to mind when reading this.
Brook |
Written by Seagull (174 comments posted) 25th July 2007 |
I keep finding these gems of yours and it's so often the case that it's all been said. Excellent satire, truly excellent.
Chris |
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