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By Raynie
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19 September 2006 |
This is my first entry on this site, so I'm a bit nervous about the reviews! Please don't hesitate to give any constructive criticism. It might hurt a little, but I need to hear it!! :) Let me sleep, let me sleep,
Let me sit around and weep
For when I'm with a cheery crowd,
My thoughts I cannot keep.
My mouth keeps running off
So I cover up with coughs,
But even when I'm occupied
My voice is not so soft. |
Written by Phil (6959 comments posted) 19th September 2006 | A strong rhyme and rhythm pattern. I found myself reading faster as I went on but I felt I should be taking it easy - especially considering your first two lines.
Keep posting,
Phil. |
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