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Poetry
Daily Train Ride
By JourneyAtNight
20 September 2006
As the title may suggest, this is just about getting the train home after University every day, where I tend to let my mind wander, as I'm sure the rest of the passengers do too.

I'm sure they all know me now as the strange girl who stares a lot. Wink

E x

Burdened Train
Rickety Chug,
Filled
With tried and tired minds

Wet footprints
Scattered and linking;
Spheres of thought
Overlapping;
Events of the day
Turning.
Yet all aware
Of watchful eyes.
Umbarellas drip dripping;
Cough
Sniff
Fidget.

Businessman
Pretending
To read a crumpled newspaper
Brow furrowed,
Shirt creased,
Head cramped
with endless woes.

A school boy
Head phones
blaring.
Stubborn,
Barricading
The unjust world
around him.

Restless mother
Face tinged pink,
Panicking,
Continuously hushing;
The baby won't stop
Crying.

Young woman
by the window
Watching
raindrops slowly
Trickling
with light.
Only to be ripped away,
a vicious wind screeching.

A shared refuge for
Reflection.
It Halts.

All thoughts are put away safely.

Stepping off,
Walking away,
Leaving it
Till tomorrow.

Reviews

Written by Phil (6683 comments posted) 20th September 2006
This is a simple but very effective poem. I really like the economy of words and the pictures you paint of the different passengers. 
 
I'm not sure about 'All thoughts put away safely.' This is only a personal response. If I have a thought I worry away at it until it's solved or it's begins to drive me mad and i have to let go. 
 
All the best, 
 
Phil.

Written by Talisker (1326 comments posted) 21st September 2006
Love your style of writing -watch the spelling though! "umbrella" - I used to say it with the extra sylable - so they sent me to speech ferapist ;)  
 
Watch you don't stare to long at one person - it can be disconcerting. 
 
Lucky you who can compartmentalize your worries just for the train - mine leak out all the time. 
 
Oli.

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