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Poetry
LIFE
By JohnnyD
03 October 2006
My imagination of LIFE as I have witnessed in various cases. Do let me know if I have been able describe the reality to your satisfaction, happy reading!

LIFE

 
Life is so unpredictable
A moment, you are breathing
The next, you stop!
The world goes haywire, when you stop
For those who depend on you!
For those who love you!
For those who care for you!
For those who need you!

 
Life is so unpredictable
For you never know,
What is going to happen the next moment?
The moment you are laughing can make you cry
For the reasons you don’t know why?
You wish…
You try…
But alas!
 
Johnny D
3rd October 2006
 

Reviews

Written by ellie-jelly (15 comments posted) 3rd October 2006
 
"the world goes haywire when you stop" this must be one important person. :p then again I may have read this in the wrong context. 
 
For me, I find it a little too generalised, and in parts just a little cliche. Perhaps draw on some rather unique experiences of your own that have made life a challenge for you. This could make it bolder. Also giving an experience of your own could possibly make the reader interact more with the poem. You have captured an aspect of life - it's unpredictability, though I think there is much more.  
 
This is just my opinion anyhow. Happy writing! 
 
Eleni.

Written by clockwork (17 comments posted) 4th October 2006
That strikes a chord with me. Almost an exact description of a mood I've had a couple of times recently that I have been unable to identify. 
 
I do hope, if it is your personal experience, that things improve for you as it is not a nice place to be. And brave of you to attempt to express it as I have been unable to do.

Written by clockwork (17 comments posted) 4th October 2006
That strikes a chord with me. Almost an exact description of a mood I've had a couple of times recently that I have been unable to identify. 
 
I do hope, if it is your personal experience, that things improve for you as it is not a nice place to be. And brave of you to attempt to express it as I have been unable to do.

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