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Poetry
Yes
By skripglow
07 October 2006
An old piece from 1988

Back of my head I feel the slaughter
take somebody else's daughter
out to the fields where no one goes
to a place I know we'll be alone
Take to the grass that rolls like lava
steal a scene from 'Onibaba'
take that girl to a place I know
and bury her deep when it's time to go
Throw the wood from the bridge to the water
wood that ended someone's daughter
three feet long and square and flat
(I couldn't afford a baseball bat)
watch it float off to the sea
feel it looking back at me
splinters point out accusations
feel another strange sensation.


Take to the road in someone's camper
smile as I leave with his head in a hamper
bury that basket deep in the ground
head for the city, get lost in the crowd
See description in the paper
laugh at the story, laugh at the news
call from a telephone out in the country
let the bastards know my views
No religion, no temptation
ain't no goddam explanation
do this thing to make me smile
I may well stop it for a while
Can't believe my own ambition
goes no further than the road
that leads me to some destination
covered in blood...
from head to toe.

Reviews
Hmm
Written by Phil (6851 comments posted) 7th October 2006
Are you seeing anyone for this? 
 
Seriously, this was a pretty powerful piece. Graphic yet with some effective images. 
 
The line: '(I couldn't afford a baseball bat)' does seem a bit out of place. It's just a little bit flippant, and for me, does not fit the rest of the piece.  
 
Liked it. 
 
Phil.
A kind of Gangsta Rap?
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 7th October 2006
Disturbing - but some of it is well thought out. I like the idea of the murder weapon floating away and looking back accusingly - kind of transferred epithet. 
 
It worries me though, what kind of mind would imagine (?) this kind of mindless violence.  
 
Oli.
uh yeah
Written by andrewbalerdi (2 comments posted) 14th March 2007
Ok this definitly works.  
 
Loving the rhyme sincaption and rythm. Really enjoyable. I would think to reowrk the title as it sounds as if 'yes' is condoning the guys behaviour and not sure if the poem suggests that.  
 
But all the same very effective, affecting and chilling. Tres bien!

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