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By dougle
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23 May 2005 |
what do you think? Her lips are as smooth as silk,
The red of true loves bloom
And sweeter than honey,
Her skin is moonlight,
Spun to suit perfection,
Her eyes are deeper than the sea
And bluer than any sky,
I lose myself in their depths
And soar in their light,
Her hair is like liquid darkness
Spun night,
Her body is of such beauty
As to make all man weep,
And her temper, like a storm at sea,
Beautiful to behold in all its unbridled majesty. |
Written by Clodagh (29 comments posted) 24th May 2005 | I really like the description here, it's a pretty little piece. You will get more hits though if you post less poems at one time though- it's a little scary to see such a long list of poems by the one person. This piece has great flow, I presume you wanted to break it up a bit judging by the caps. There is only one line i dislike "as to make all man weep" it's a mouthful to read. Anyway this is how I would probably format it-
Her
Her lips are as smooth as silk;
the red of true loves bloom
and sweeter than honey.
Her skin is moonlight,
spun to suit perfection,
Her eyes are deeper than the sea
and bluer than any sky,
I lose myself in their depths
and soar in their light.
Her hair is like liquid darkness-
Spun night.
Her body is of such beauty
as to make all man weep,
and her temper,
like a storm at sea,
Beautiful to behold
in all its unbridled majesty. |
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