These are for real and made me laugh when I was researching Ramadan. I've only substituted some more contemporary terminology to aid the understanding of the non-muslims amongst us.
Istimna (Wanking)
1597. If a person, who is observing a fast, jerks-off the jelly juice, his fast becomes void. (The explanation of Istimna is given in rule 1581/iii)
1598. If you shoot out some baby-gravy involuntarily, that’s ok.
1599. Even if a person knows that if he sleeps during the day he will have soggy dreams, that is he will become Mohtalim, i.e. love-custard will be spouted during sleep, it is still permissible for him to sleep, even if he does not become inconvenienced by not sleeping. And if he shoots his wad while asleep, his fast is not void.
1600. If a person who is observing fast, wakes up from sleep while firing a shot, it is not obligatory on him to stop it.
1601. A fasting person who has knocked one out while asleep (Mohtalim), is permitted to piss, even though by doing so the remaining spunk will be ejected from his love-stick.
1603.A person who indulges in courtship (sic), with the intention to allow the love-custard to be spurted, will end his fast, even if he has a dry one.
1604.If a fasting person indulges in courtship (sic) without the intention to allow the shooting of his man-milk, and also, if he is sure that his nut-oil will not be ejected, his fast is in order, even if he blows his load unexpectedly. However, if he was in doubt about the outcome and he cracks his marbles, his fast is void.
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Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3566 comments posted) 11th October 2006 |
I thought the term was onanism not Istimna but I defer to your research. Is Ramadan a celebration of Istimna then, if so I have this weird mental image of crowds of them all indulging in sychronised wanking
Anyway if this is the research,sweetie, I can't wait for the finished article
cheers
BBS |
Ewwww!
Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 12th October 2006 |
Is this honestly for real? As I read this, I kept wondering if the translator managed to keep a straight face throughout.
And there I was thinking that the Old Testament was pretty racy! |
Written by Phil (6959 comments posted) 12th October 2006 |
Hmm. Sticky subject perhaps. You've got to hand it to them etc etc ad nauseum.
Certainly different - and with so many euphemisms available, you could go on forever - with the piece that is - I'm sure you'd get cramp going on forever doing the other.....
All the best,
Phil. |
this --
Written by fellpony (1714 comments posted) 30th January 2007 |
er - "came up" on the side menu tonight and I read it crying with laughter. Oh dear that's not PC but who the hell cares.
Enough! I must go to bed. If I can.
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