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Poetry
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Hopeless
By JourneyAtNight
15 October 2006
This is just a piece on civil war...not much to say other than it really pains and angers me.
Hack away as you please.
E x


Co-existence crushed
A crimson line of blood marks the divide
Of souls shot down
among the ruins of their minds.

Void of understanding
Blindly beholding rage
Driven by discrimination
Hate spreads - poison in their veins.

They say "In the name of God"
But I'll be damned if this is blessed.
Should I feel pity or loathing?
As morals leak from their hopeless hearts.

Reviews

Written by Phil (6959 comments posted) 15th October 2006
Well expressed feelings. Now all the little wars are starting to join hands it's all the more powerful. 
 
Loved the line:among the ruins of their minds. 
 
as it's the mind and twisted ideas that cause this, not the body. 
 
All the best, 
 
Phil.

Written by rilLie (328 comments posted) 16th October 2006
excellent piece. 
 
-rilLie 
 
0_o
Very poignant
Written by Talisker (1331 comments posted) 17th October 2006
And well said, JAN.  
 
In answer to the question; I think we should feel a bit of anger towards those who precipitated the present debacle, pity towards the victims (including the unfortunate soldiers) and loathing for those who see turmoil as a good cover for establishing tyrannies. 
 
Oli

Written by ellipinnock (1786 comments posted) 3rd November 2006
Very powerful piece. The ending felt a little abrupt to me, I felt as though there was another verse missing from this somehow. Strong writing. 
 
Elli

Written by Thunder_God (1 comments posted) 9th September 2007
This is my first review so I hope I’m going about it the right way. 
 
This was a thoughtful poem and nicely structured. 
 
They say "In the name of God" 
But I'll be damned if this is blessed. 
 
This line had the strongest impact on me and I think is on the minds of a lot of people in our current climate. Nice play on words to. 
 
It could probably do with an extra verse, just to make the piece a little more satisfying. 
 
Really enjoyed this, thanks for sharing. 

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