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Barbed Wire and Dandelion Petals |
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By gutterkitty
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04 November 2006 |
Poetry seems to come and go as she pleases (or at least, she does in my case).
She’s as frustrating as a flirt.
I think she may well be one.
She’ll knock on my door at midnight,
and I know if I don’t let her in
she’ll slip through the cracks in the door-frame.
Tonight she offers a nest
of violet eggs, a stained bow-tie
and a bouquet of barbed wire. Declaring
that I shall make dinner tonight.
I’ve never once said no.
She sits and watches as I fry the eggs
with their shiny purple eyes,
as I make stained bow-tie sandwiches
and barbed-wire soup. All the while
criticising everything I do.
I set it all out in cracked china plates
and pluck dandelions to make dandelion tea.
She eats it all greedily, fingers stained with
purple yolk and pricked with
bulbs of barbed-wire blood.
I see the red of a satin bow-tie
disappear between her lips. She never says thank-you,
but adopts a satisfied smile. Kisses my cheek,
and whispers in my ear.
Words that stick in the whorls like sugar.
Then she laughs, touches my lips,
picks up her coat,
and leaves. Banging the door shut, the familiar sound
that folds my world into a tiny square, like paper.
And creases me into a kitchen overflowing
with cracked violet egg shells,
barbed wire and dandelion petals.
And trails of sugar, left like promises.
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lovely images Written by francoise (129 comments posted) 4th November 2006 | This piece read well and I liked the way you carried the central images through to the concluding verse. I was left wondering about some of them though (the violet eggs, stained bow tie) because I don't know what they represent to me (or how they connect with you) ... interesting fran | Written by Phil (6393 comments posted) 4th November 2006 | I wish she'd come and flirt with me a little more often. This did read well. On one level, almost like stage directions. I liked it. Like Francoise, I too was left wondering about: Purple yolk and pricked with Bulbs of barbed-wire blood. I see the red of a satin bow-tie It could be my dimness. All the best, Phil.
| I love it... Written by Talisker (1300 comments posted) 5th November 2006 | I like the "purple yolk" and "bulbs of barbed-wire blood" - because both paint vivid pictures in my mind. I think you're a bit of a Jackson Pollock poet in that you embrace the abstract. This I like, but cannot do myself. Old JP didn't do bad for himself either. Wonderful Gutterkitty. A talent par excellence. Oli | Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 6th November 2006 | Thanks for your comments Francoise, Phil and Oli Francoise and Phil- the items I use in the poem don't have any personal significance for me. I tried to express how poetry (as inspiration) comes at random and often gives the writer ideas which are difficult to work with. I therefore chose items which are bizarre and slightly eerie in nature. I also chose them for their vivid colours- there's a lot of colour in this poem. Thanks for your questions- and Phil, you're certainly not dim! Oli- I didn't realise until you pointed it out, but I do nearly always deal with abstract ideas. I have a vivid imagination and I can give it a free reign when I write. When I do write about the norm I like to give it a bit of an abstract twist; it's more fun writing that way, and (I think) more original. Thanks a lot for your interest, and your lovely compliment  | Written by ellipinnock (1753 comments posted) 7th November 2006 | I liked this (as I generally do with all your stuff). I thought the first stanza made a weak start to what is a very strong poem. maybe because the imagery is so strong throughout the rest of the piece. A nice play on the illusiveness of the muse! Elli | Written by gutterkitty (362 comments posted) 7th November 2006 | Thanks elli! I'm glad you like my work. The first stanza is a problem I have with a lot of poems; should I include a short introductory piece to create a smoother beginning and aid the reader's understanding, or just jump straight it to make a stronger impression, and hope the audience can make the leap too? I'm still working on it! Thanks again. | oh ro... Written by no1butClo (337 comments posted) 23rd April 2007 | wow. It's actually beautiful in the most peculiar way. It's like The Cat in the Hat but a touch less surreal and absolutely perfect. nice one kitty clo |
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