The road gets steep. Diary of a Bacchanal (Part 2a)
Ah, now the ascent has begun. The gradient is steep, the going is hard. The foothills of yesterday are but a fond memory. I am gasping in the rarefied air – but my lungs are weak. Must struggle on now, my goal is clear, the crystal dagger peak, piercing the blue yonder like an Apollo rocket.
After a modest dinner of baked potato, coleslaw and baked beans, I retired to the dark solitude of the bedroom. I find this a way, perhaps not a great way, but effective, of filling that hour or so when I would usually be thinking of the supermarket wine aisle.
I awoke half an hour ago and headed to the shack (the small box-room in which I write, read and play guitar). What now? I must keep my mind occupied. Fill the void with something. It needn’t be meaningful. It’s about getting to the next base-camp, whatever happens.
I dread another sweaty, sleepless night, but my resolve remains firm. I’ve made an undertaking publicly, here on GW, and I do not intend to fail. Having said which, I have failed countless times before. From past experience the second night has always been the worst. I don’t know about a third sober night, perhaps that event was too long ago for me to recall.
If anyone is reading this, I have reached the milestone of 21.00 hrs on the second night. I recall a quote from someone or other that went; “every fibre of my being screams for alcohol!” I know exactly what was meant.
Oli (07/11/06) |
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3369 comments posted) 7th November 2006 | A fine bit of writing considering your present condition and in response I can do no better than quote my Hero Van Morrison and say "It's too late to stop now"
cheers
BBS |
Written by Phil (6738 comments posted) 7th November 2006 | Hi Oli.
Still here reading. Still here wishing you well.
All the best,
Phil.
-Another well written piece too. Is this what's called a blog? |
Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 7th November 2006 | Keep it up -- seriously! Make it 9:30 tomorrow, then 10:00 the next night -- then make one day an alcohol-free day.
Easy for me to talk -- I went off alcohol 99.9% after my last baby was born and can now get seriously drunk on two glasses of wine. Not an option for you, but there are plenty more. A friend of mine swore off alcohol after driving through the Navajo Nation. He just got so depressed seeing so many people for whom alcohol was, too obviously, a final solution.
'It's too late to stop now' is a pretty good mantra, I'd say. . . | Keep going
Written by Snodlander (501 comments posted) 7th November 2006 | Echoing what Witzl said, my bro is now teetotal, after one of his early jobs as the only male living in a nurses' home. He would see friends get wrecked then sleep with guys they'd never have the time for sober. Then he went on to work with families for some of whom alcohol was a problem. But I'm sure you are more aware of the problems it causes than I am.
On the climbing front I'm afraid that due to a slight communication problem, I have failed to bring with me any crampons. However, should the need arise, I have a rucksack full of tampons that you are most welcome to. | Raise a Glass to the Gael...
Written by gerardconnolly (1186 comments posted) 8th November 2006 | Mineral water, of course.
Oli. While I share the kind empathy of Jane, Phil, Mary and Bob above. I'll spare you any sympathy. A very good friend of mine, Alan Carlyle, ironically also a Scot, beat alcholism. He told me that what strengthened his resolve more than anything were the words of friends that underscored what was good about him. Self-worth became such a goading talisman. That's why I'll tell you some of the things that I find so compelling about you and why I always and instinctively turn to whatever you write.
You are bitingly honest. And with yourself as others. And you don't patronise with false praise.
You wear your heart on your shirt sleeve and lead with your chin. Whatever anybody else thinks.
You review the work of others constantly and without any thought of a return courtesy.
And also, you are, in my opinion, along with Patterjack, far and away the most skillful wordsmith on this site by an Irish mile.
Think about that in the pokey dark room. And don't bother to respond to what I have said or deny any of it with false modesty. I wouldn't insult you with oily blether if it wasn't true.
Grand feller! My compliments to you.
Slan! |
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