People today were digesting the news that scientists claim that marmite may help calm the middle east conflict.
 “We realised the one thing both sides have in common is their use of unleaved  bread in their diet” said  one of the scientists “The lack of yeast means they are deficient in certain essential minerals such as Zinc and the B vitamins which are known to benefit the nerves and parts of the brain involved in behaviour”
They went on to claim to an astonished audience that marmite has all the missing ingredients in abundance and if both sides were to include it in their diets it might cause a change in their behaviour towards each other.
Tony Blair is said to be guardedly in favour. “Well, hey y’know why not ,y’know give it a try. Cherie always puts it on my soldiers, it keeps me calm. I’m trying to persuade Prescott to try it before he twats someone again but he claims it’s soft southern, nancy-boy piss and will only drink Bovril”
George Bush has hailed it as  a  possible break through saying “Tony Blair tells me it’s very popular in Great Bahrain and is a favourite with your  Queen. Mind you, it didn’t do much for Freddie Mercury but the other three look good on it”
Reaction in the middle east has been mixed. Fawzi Barhoum for Hamas denounced it as Zionist conspiracy designed to de-lead the pencils of Arab men everywhere “We have no idea what this evil smelling stuff will do to our todgers” he said. “The Israelis hope to out-breed us with this foul concoction.”
A Fatah spokesman was a little more conciliatory but on being pressed admitted he only used it to keep the camels off his dates.
Reaction from the  Knesset has been muted. “Sweet Jesus,you guys actually eat this” was all we could get from a spokesman. After American pressure president Ehud Olmert issued a statement. “We have given the matter careful consideration but the stumbling block  is it tastes like shit. If this is the answer I’m not sure I wouldn’t rather risk the bombs”
Secretary General Kofi Annan was unfazed by this  unanimous rejection of the extract saying
“Well, it is well know with Marmite that you either love it or you hate it and we seem to have a convergence of opinion here as they all hate it. This is a hopeful sign. I think we have at last found some common ground to work on.
The scientists went into a blind sulk complaining he had missed the point.