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By Talisker
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16 November 2006 |
My hopes have dissolved, like pearls in a vinegar sea,
I watched them shrink, and shrink, and shrink,
Then disappear into solution.
But no solution.
My prayers have joined the other pollutants,
Up, up and away, through the ozone hole,
To boldly go, where no lies have gone before.
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Self pity
Written by ellipinnock (1753 comments posted) 15th November 2006 | never did anyone any good (trust me, I know) so I hope you're not indulging. Chin up lad.
Thought the poem was sad but accomplished.
Elli | Pitiful, right enough, but..
Written by gerardconnolly (1186 comments posted) 15th November 2006 | Its ME you should feel sorry, you self indulgent ninny!!
I've an editor who is a complete cretin! An agent who seems to live over on the dark side of the moon! Herslf isn't speaking to me because yesterday I was so angry I ran over a neighbour's cat! Four grown children who still seem to regard me a their sole means of support! And I keep getting dark and uncharitable letters from the Inland Revenue suggesting I owe THEM money!! Owe them money!! I pay enough tax to liquidate the fucking Third World Debt!!! If there was any justice in this world I SHOULD BE GETTING AN OBE FOR PATIENCE AND FOREBEARANCE!!!
Oh yes! And one other thing. Every tme I log on to the GW site someone who has more talent than most of the rest laid end to end the world, the world over keeps telling ME I should pity HIM!!!
God's Buckin' Donkey's Buckin' Bare Butt!! You couldn't invent it!!!
Slan! | Pity
Written by Fledermaus (3453 comments posted) 16th November 2006 | Some great lines in this poem. But... Self pity is of course pathetic  | Do Pearls really dissolve in vinegar?
Written by Garrulous (108 comments posted) 16th November 2006 | Good poem - love the juxtaposition of the two meanings of solution.
If no one else has pity on you then why not a bit of self pity?
Gar. | Apparently they do!!
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 16th November 2006 | I heard about it yesterday on the radio. So don't wear your favorite pearls when your indulging in a vinegary cod'n'chip Gary! Stick to the fake ones!
Oli  |
Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 16th November 2006 | I agree with all the preceding comments, but disagree to some extent on the issue of self pity. Self pity is actually a lot of fun to wallow in, providing you keep tabs on it. It is like all pleasant things: a little is great, but too much is detrimental to your mental stability. I don't really think that it is pathetic unless you begin to take it too seriously. I would rather sing a couple of verses of 'Poor, Poor, Pitiful Me' than indulge in recreational drugs.
I liked the line about your hopes going boldly where no lies had gone before. Maybe they will run into some of mine up there. . .
So my advice is to go on and wallow -- just keep writing your fine poems, too.
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Written by Phil (6846 comments posted) 16th November 2006 | Fine Poem Oli. Really thought this was top class. Short, but with some excellent original ideas and lines. (for me anyway)
Pity passes, the man remains.
Chin up pal.
All the best,
Phil.
| Like but
Written by wildworm (7 comments posted) 20th November 2006 | Like all but the double solution part, maybe it's the "but no" in particular, if it was "without" instead then maybe....
I think D.H.Lawrence said it best with these lines
from his poem Self Pity...
I never saw a wild thing
sorry for itself.
A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough
without ever having felt sorry for itself.
- D.H.Lawrence
I wonder if we humans are the only creature to feel sorry for themselves, it won't surprise me one bit... 
-Eddy | and then...
Written by no1butClo (339 comments posted) 23rd April 2007 | You probably don't want to, but I'm dying to hear more of this. Perhaps you should finish it one day. it feels ujnresolved...unless that's the point...? Oh my head hurts from mechanics papers 
well done, anyway
clo |
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