|
Written by Garrulous (108 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
I could relate to the message you were trying to put across here about mans lack of humility in the face of nature or greater powers perhaps.
On first reading I wasn't happy with 'Before relentless time began' due to it's contradictory nature but if it is intended paradoxically then I think it is quite clever.
Gar. |
No paradox Gary
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
Time is a human construct, when did man begin to measure it or even conceive of it?
Oli |
Written by Phil (6838 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
Reading your intro I was expecting something a little more light-hearted. Still, no disappointment here. Fine poem Oli. With you on the time issue.
(I got my bronze swimming certificate - but three days after passing my cyclng proficiency I was knocked off my bike by a car. It took months to save for another second hand delight.)
All the best,
Phil. |
Written by Garrulous (108 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
Nice attempt at being profound Oli but time has been a factor in the lives of all the creatures that have ever inhabited the earth, mating, migration etc all dictated by the passage of the seasons and judged to perfection by an inherent biological clock.
I'd like to see you tell a hungry lion that it isn't breakfast time because "time is a human construct".
Gar. |
Cairnpapple Hill
Written by Josie (2825 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
| Very well written Oli. We have evidence of history going so far back in our country, don't we? Yet it seems that in the short time I've been on this earth, everything seems to be moving forward at such a speed. I know that on Ilkley Moor too there are signs of neolithic man, but also it is possible to find sea fossils from tropical areas that take us back even further. I enjoyed reading this very much. Quite a contrast to my hilarity. |
Oh dear Garry!
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
What piffle. I couldn't tell a lion anything, because I don't speak lionese. Even if I could, I doubt the idea of regular meal times would mean much!
Of course seasons (what we now call time) have always passed, but you're not trying to tell me that animals share our (or any) perception of time???? Man, with his (sometimes) superior intellect, had a notion, labled it time, found ways of measuring it. Before that, to all intents and purposes time didn't exist.
Next you'll be telling me that electrickery always existed too!
 Oli |
Written by ellipinnock (1753 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
Don't start him off again, we only just got over the last bout...
my biological clock certainly ent judged to perfection 
Liked the poem, you should stand there proud with your 200m swimming badge!
Elli
ps. 'ent'-big animated tree-shepherd thingy |
What piffle indeed...
Written by Garrulous (108 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
'had a notion, labled it time, found ways of measuring it'
Or maybe they managed to quantify a natural cycle in existence since long before man appeared on this world.
Man labelled or labeled (certainly not labled) air, found ways of measuring it but they absolutely did not invent it. I think you struggle to differentiate between the tangible and the intangible here which is a shame.
With regards animals and their perception of time. I suggest some hearty research on your part.
 |
Written by LynB (435 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
| I suggest you stop dissecting every single poem you read, and just enjoy it for what it is - beautifully written verse, by a man who knows how to stir people's emotions. And you ought to know about piffle, from what I've read, you spend most of your time writing it.... |
Written by Garrulous (108 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
LynB. Bit harsh. I am fairly new to this site and took the lead on the ettiquete for reviews based on the comments of those such as Oli and Ellie. However unlike most on here who seem to meet out criticism based on who wrote the piece rather than the content (I have researched this extensively) I like to comment on what I see in front of me. I query, Oli responds, I respond, Oli responds, this is how humans occassionally interact and obviously we both share a similar tongue in cheek stubborn streak.
If you had actually read all of my posts as you seem to suggest you would have seen several positive views including work from Oli and Ellie.
With regards to my work - the comment is a churlish one but I don't take it too heart as I don't really put much effort into any poetry that goes on here. I believe I read one of your poems which was poor but was kindly received due to it's sensitive subject matter.
Such is the way of these things. |
Written by Garrulous (108 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
| Ooh look at all my typos. See it's not good to get cross. |
I'm out of here
Written by LynB (435 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
Sorry to threadjack, Oli, but I just wondered, is it true? Did all those people who commented on my poem only write positive reviews because of the subject matter? Was it really a load of crap as our friend Garrulous seems to think? If he is right, then obviously I have no place on this board.
As a relative newcomer, he obviously doesn't realise that it doesn't take much to crush my self esteem, and he has done just that. So, behind all these glowing reviews I've had, for my prose and poetry, there was just a desire to raise my self esteem and nothing else. My writing was actually crap. Is that the truth? If it is, I'll just take myself and my little stories and leave you all in peace. |
OK, Leave it out chums!
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
Since it's my poem, my definition of time counts, I think that's fair!
For what its worth, neither of us are "correct" - your definition of time as an absolute is the Darwinian one. My definition is the Liebnizian or Einsteinian, i.e. that time is relative to perception, to motion, to space. In that model, if you can't measure it, it doesn't exist.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Time
Modern physics suggests that absolute time started with the "Big Bang" So even that version may have a start point. The whole thing is a moot point in relation to a bloody poem! Let me say, if you were locked in a dark cell for life, or if our anciant man lived through a dark 40 years of permanent winter, no sun to see, no stars, what would time mean then? How would you or he perceive time? An hour could be a week, a week a year!
Lyn - Thanks for leaping to my defence
Garr - thanks for the chat
Oli |
Lyn!
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
Your stuff IS good.
The bun fight is silly. I'll PM you.
Oli |
Written by LynB (435 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
| I'm sorry, I didn't mean to start a fight. I'll just slip quietly away. |
Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3446 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
I was going to comment on the poem (which I thought a fine one) but am moved to respond to the reviews. Isn't Gar just giving his honest opinion which is something you have championed yourself
[And for heavens sakes, Lyn, thats the point of the site]
It was his honest and genuine reaction to the work; just accept it and take it on board there is no need to respond to it other than to thank him for taking an interest. It's really no good chiding him for not understaning or "getting it wrong" I'm not getting at you a lot of people here do it and it just isn't polite. Surely the work stands or falls without explanation.
Just my honest reaction- not really a gripe
And I thought the poem was one of your best
cheers
J |
Written by Garrulous (108 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
Lyn. Having had a chance to reflect on your other work then for what it's worth your righting is far from crap. Personally I meant what I said about your last piece though but that is one piece.
Don't take offense so easily and dont assume that if I criticise something it means I have something against the author. Reviews are meant to be balanced after all.
Oli. The art of debate is a dying one and I salute you for bandying with me.
Cheerio.
Gar. |
It's OK, Gar and BBS...
Written by LynB (435 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
I won't be accused of not being polite, because as I said, I'm out of here.
I never learn. I always shoot myself in the foot, now I have to leave everything that I've found here.
Sorry to all I have offended. |
Sweet St.Patrick on Heelys!!!
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
What have I started here?
 |
Written by LynB (435 comments posted) 20th November 2006 |
You didn't start it, Oli - I did!!  |
This has now gone too far...
Written by gerardconnolly (1186 comments posted) 21st November 2006 |
Leave St Patrick out of this, please. I don't care what happens to humans or animals but I won't stand idly by and have God's Saints suffer blastphemy.
Slan! |
Sorry Gerard...
Written by LynB (435 comments posted) 21st November 2006 |
| it's my fault. I just don't know when to keep my mouth shut. |
Only registered users can rate and write comments.
Please login or register.
Previous item
