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Great Writing - Home > Extended > Let no man put asunder - chapter 21
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Extended Work
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| Let no man put asunder - chapter 21 | |
| By LynB | ||||
| 21 November 2006 | ||||
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Chapter 21 Morning arrived all too soon, and Jon closed his eyes against the sun that streamed through the curtains. He just wanted to turn over and go to sleep again, as he had hardly slept at all during the night. Suddenly, the door opened, and a nurse came in. His eyes lit up for the first time in days, when he realised it was Eliza. “How are you feeling?” she said, smiling warmly, as she wrapped a blood pressure cuff around his arm. “You look better” “I’m tired” he said, rubbing his eyes. “I didn’t sleep too well last night. I didn’t expect to see you. It’s a lovely surprise.” “It shouldn’t be that much of a surprise” she said, picking up the chart at the end of the bed. “I do work here!” “When can I go home, Eliza? I’ve had enough. I just want to be back in familiar surroundings.” “Well” she began, sitting down next to the bed. “You won’t be allowed home unless there’s someone to look after you” “Why? Do you think I might try and finish the job?” “No!” she replied, shocked at the bitterness in his voice. “Well, partly, I suppose. Anyway, no hospital would ever send a patient home to an empty house, no matter what they were in for. So, it’s just as well I’m taking a few days’ leave to look after you, isn’t it?” For a moment, he was not quite sure what to say. She was giving up some of her precious, hard-earned leave to look after him – God, she must love him. He felt his eyes filling with tears, and fought to keep hold of his self-control. “Eliza, you don’t have to do this” he said, his voice virtually a whisper. “It’s above and beyond the call of duty!” “Look” she said, putting her hand on his. “One – I know I don’t have to, but I want to, and two – it’s not a duty, it’s my pleasure. I care deeply for you, and I want to help you through this. So, don’t say another word!” “Do you want to see a grown man cry, Eliza?” “Of course not!” “Well, you’d better leave right now, then!” “Oh, what am I going to do with you!” “A hug will do for now!” he said, his smile warming her heart. “Coming right up!” she said, leaning over and pulling him close. “A dose of Nurse Eliza’s special medicine!” “That’s the kind of medicine I could easily become addicted to!” he said, as she gently kissed him, before leaving the room. A few days later, Jon was discharged from hospital, and, as she had promised, Eliza took him home with her. He had not seen Donna since he had told her to leave, after her revelation that Steve was looking after the children. Even though he had told Eliza he was feeling much better, he could not get it out of his mind. The fact that another man was looking after his precious children hurt him more than words could say. Eliza noticed that he was rather quiet during the journey back to her flat, but she put it down to the fact that he was still feeling under the weather. When she parked the car outside the flat, he did not get out straight away, but just sat there, lost in his thoughts. She put a gentle hand on his arm. “Come on” she said, softly. “Let’s go inside, shall we? I’ll make you a nice up of tea. How does that sound?” “Great” he said, trying to force a smile. “I’m just glad to be out of there!” As he got out of the car, Eliza noticed that he was a little unsteady on his feet, and put her arm protectively through his, until they reached the front door. She made sure he was seated comfortably on the sofa, before placing a very welcome cup of tea in front of him. He kept giving her sideways glances, as if he wanted to say something to her, but was not quite sure how to start. As he lifted up his cup of tea, his hands began to shake, and he swiftly put it down again, blinking away the tears that suddenly stung his eyes. His distress was not lost on Eliza, and she gently put her hand on his, waiting for him to regain his composure. “What’s wrong with me?” he said, his voice shaking. “I can’t even hold a cup of tea!” “Don’t worry.” Her voice was gentle and calming. “Your body’s taken a lot of punishment. You need to regain your strength. Come on – try again. It’ll be all right!” She lifted up the cup and offered it to him. As his hands began to shake again, she gently steadied his arm as he took a few mouthfuls, before setting it down again. “I’ll drink the rest in a minute” he said, leaning back and closing his eyes. “I’m feeling rather tired at the moment, and I just want to sleep, and…..” “And what?” she prompted, putting her hand on his shoulder. “and – and, I don’t know.. I don’t know, Eliza! It’s – it’s, oh, I can’t explain…” “Try” she said, softly, handing him a tissue as the tears began to flow. “Take your time. Tell me what’s wrong.” “It’s hard to explain, Eliza. I just feel so low, so inadequate. I feel like shutting myself away from the world – that way I can’t get hurt again. I thought nothing could hurt more than seeing my wife with another man, but I was wrong. When she said she didn’t trust me to be alone with our children, it felt like a knife in my heart – I love my children, Eliza, more than life itself. Then, when she came to visit me in hospital, it gave me a glimmer of hope – maybe she did still care after all! How bloody wrong can you be! She said that what I’d done proved she’d made the right decision all along, then she twisted that knife just a little further, by letting slip that she’d left them with him while she was visiting me! I’d rather she’d stayed away, than leave my children with him! He’s not their father, Eliza – I am! I’m their father! He’s not their father and he never will be! The thought of those children growing up without me breaks my heart…..” “Come here” she said, reaching out and pulling him close. “Hang in there. Things have a habit of working out.” “I wish I could believe you.” “I know what you need” she said, stroking his hair. “You need a total change of scene – get away from it all” “What do you mean?” A look of fear suddenly crossed his face, as he pulled away from her. “When you feel a little bit stronger, maybe we could go out somewhere nice and quiet. Take a picnic, or something, and go for a walk. Somewhere where you can forget the rest of the world exists. What do you say?” “I – I don’t know, Eliza. I’m not sure if I can face it…” “You don’t have to face anything! I know a quiet little spot I used to go when I was a kid. I had some lovely times there, and I think you’d like it. It’s off the beaten track, and it’s very peaceful. I think it’ll do you good. Come on, Jon. Let me help you. Put your pride to one side, and let me help – please?” “Oh, Eliza” he said, leaning his head on her shoulder. “What on earth would I have done without you? You’ve done so much for me, I can never repay you…” “I don’t want repayment. All I want is to see you smile again – that would be worth more than gold to me!” “I wouldn’t hold your breath, Eliza – not just yet. Still, you never know! Maybe one day, something will go right!” “Of course it will! Don’t ever give up hope! Anyway, you know that, whatever happens, I’ll be here for you, so there’s nothing to be afraid of.” “I know” he whispered, kissing her gently on the cheek, and holding her close. “I know.” A few days later, when the sun was shining, Eliza thought that it would be a good idea to carry out her suggestion. She packed a picnic, and they set off. As she drove down the quiet, country lanes, she noticed that Jon was looking rather thoughtful. “Penny for them” she said, smiling warmly at him. “You look miles away. Are you all right?” “That depends on the pollen count” he said, returning her smile. “As long as it stays low I’ll be fine. It’s when it starts creeping up that the problems start!” “It’s quite low at the moment, I think. At least that’s what it said on the weather forecast, so you should be all right! Ah, here we are! I’ll leave the car here, and we can just walk through to this little clearing, and there’s a lovely view over the fields. Come on, I’ll show you!” As he sat on the blanket that Eliza had put down, looking across the rolling green fields that stretched as far as the eye could see, he suddenly felt something that he had not felt for a long time – peace. He did not know how long it would last, but he was making the most of it while it did. “You make a lovely picnic, Eliza” he said, tucking into a slice of homemade chocolate cake. “This cake is delicious. You’re a woman of many talents, aren’t you?” “I don’t know about that” she replied, blushing. “but it’s nice of you to say so. Are you enjoying yourself?” “It’s very peaceful here. It’s almost like the rest of the world doesn’t exist. It’s like we’re the only two people around – do you know what I mean? Sometimes, when we were touring, I just liked to get away on my own – just to wind down for a while. I’ve always loved being at one with nature, even if it does make me sneeze!” “Oh, you daft beggar!” she said, beginning to laugh. “What are you like?” Her laughter was so infectious, he could not help joining in. He could not remember the last time he had laughed – he could not remember the last time he had had reason to. He pushed back her hair, and kissed her gently on the cheek, then he stood up and held out his hand. “Shall we go for a walk?” “No” she said, gazing up at him. “I don’t really feel like it! I’m quite happy here. Besides, I’m in a lazy mood, today! Come and sit down! Let’s just relax and enjoy the view!” “There’s a beautiful view from where I’m sitting.” he said, softly. “Yes, those fields are quite spectacular, aren’t they?” “I’m not talking about the fields” he said, causing her to blush once again. “You’re right, let’s just relax! I’m going to have a lie down!” “I’m going to let you in on a secret” she said, suddenly sounding very wistful. “Now, promise me you won’t laugh!” “I would never laugh at you, Eliza. Come on, tell me.” “I’ve always dreamed about you serenading me, with one of my favourite songs – just the two of us. I love your voice so much – I always have. It just gets to me, like no other ever has, or ever will. Would you sing for me, Jon? Please? Make at least one of my dreams come true.” “Of course I will. You’ve done so much for me. What do you want me to sing? Anything special?” “Well, I’ve always loved ‘Fields of Gold’. Do you know that one?” Only too well, he thought, as so many memories crowded his mind. Instead, he plastered on a smile, and, taking a deep breath, he began to sing. Eliza sat there, entranced, a beatific smile on her face, as that glorious tenor she loved so well began to soar, rivalling the birds with its sweetness. He had thought he could make it to the end, but as Emily’s face came into his mind, his voice began to falter, and Eliza stared in amazement, as he clasped his hands around his knees, rested his head on his arms, and began to cry his heart out. “Hey” she said, gathering him into her arms. “What’s all this? Why the tears?” “Why did you ask me to sing that song?” he wept, tears streaming down his face. “Why that one? Why did it have to be that one?” “Because it’s one of my favourites” she said, completely mystified. “Why has it upset you so much? Was it one of Donna’s favourite songs? Is that it?” “No, it’s a long story. It’s one of Emily’s. Brings back a lot of memories – most of them good, but right now, they hurt. They hurt so bad – oh God, I’ve ruined everything! I’ve ruined your special song, and I’ve ruined our day out! Just for a while, I felt at peace, I felt happy - I should’ve known it wouldn’t last! I should’ve known that it would all come back again! Sometimes the pain is so bad, Eliza, I just wish there was a way to ease it! No one can help me….” “I can” she whispered, gently touching his face. “I can ease your pain – if you’ll let me!” “How?” he said, an expression on his face she could not quite fathom. “Like this” She cupped his face in her hands, and kissed him slowly and tenderly. He turned away, and tried to stand up. “No, Eliza!” he protested, his voice full of anguish. “I can’t! I…” “You can” she said, her voice a husky whisper. “Yes, you can..” “I don’t want to!” “Methinks the gentleman doth protest too much” she said, smiling, her eyes bright. “Come on, it’s all right. Let go – let me love you! You know how I feel…” Suddenly he felt something stir deep inside, something he had not felt for a long, long time. Feelings he had thought were dead and buried came rushing to the surface, and try as he might, he could not stop them. He put his arms around her, and crushed her to his chest, taking her breath away as his lips claimed hers. Caught off guard, Eliza fell back on to the blanket, pulling him with her. For a moment, they both lay there unmoving, just looking at each other, before his feelings took over once again. “Oh, Eliza!” he whispered, moaning as her hands found their way under his shirt. “I don’t know if it’s right or wrong, and I really don’t care! I want you! So help me God, I want you…..!”
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