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Great Writing - Home > Extended > Let no man put asunder - chapter 23
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Extended Work
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| Let no man put asunder - chapter 23 | |
| By LynB | ||||||||||
| 21 November 2006 | ||||||||||
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Chapter 23 There was a stunned silence, as they all stared at each other, quite unable to believe what David had just said. Steve was not quite sure what to do at first. He did not want to upset the little boy by refusing to hold him, yet he did not want to inflame the situation further. “No, David!” he said, gently. “I’m not daddy! Look – there’s daddy!” “Daddy!” repeated David, still holding his arms out to Steve. “Daddy!” “You’d better take him, Steve” said Donna, her voice shaking. “He doesn’t understand. He doesn’t know why you don’t want to hold him.” “Yes, you’d better take him” said Jon, suddenly finding his voice. “You’ve taken my wife, so why don’t you finish the job, and take my kids as well? Go on! Take him!” “I’m sorry, Jon.” Steve’s voice was strained. “I swear, this has never happened before! I’ve never done anything to make him think I was his daddy! I feel terrible about this, I….” “Shut up” said Jon, his voice a strangled whisper. “Just shut up, while I try and take this in. Oh, Jesus, my little boy has just called another man ‘daddy’! The first word I’ve ever heard him say! He doesn’t even know me! I can’t take this in, I… oh God…..” He had tried his utmost to control himself in front of his children, but now he could not hold back any longer; the pain was almost beyond bearing. After all he had been through, he thought he could take anything life had to throw at him, but this had hurt him more than words could ever describe. Donna and Steve stared at each other, as he put his hands over his face and wept. Emily looked up at them, and then back at Jon. She was confused – what was happening here? Her daddy was sitting next to her, shaking with silent uncontrollable sobs, and yet mummy was just standing by, and watching. “Mummy!” she said, tugging her hand. “Daddy’s crying!” “I know” said Donna, staring straight ahead. “Well, give him a cuddle, then! He needs a cuddle, mummy!” “I don’t think he’d want one from me, Emily.” Emily did not answer her, but turned back to Jon, wrapping her arms around his neck. He held her close, still completely incapable of speech. She laid her head on his shoulder, whispering soft words of comfort that carried only to his ears. “It’ll be all right. I know you’re my daddy, and Rosie and Clare know you’re their daddy, too. One day, David will know – he will!” “I’m so sorry, Jon” said Steve, putting his hand on his shoulder. “Honest to God, I never meant this to happen!” “Go away!” shouted Emily, pushing his hand away. “Leave my daddy alone! This is all your fault! It’s your fault my daddy went away, and it’s your fault he’s sad! I wish you’d go away, and never come back! I hate you! I hate you!” “Emily!” said Donna, glancing up at Steve. “Don’t speak to Steve like that! He’s a guest in our home!” “Don’t care! He hurt my daddy, and I can never forgive him for that! I thought you would understand that, mummy! I love my daddy, and I can still remember when you did, too….” “It’s all right, Emily” said Jon, pulling away from her, and standing up. “I appreciate you sticking up for me, but I’m afraid I can’t stay here a minute longer. Every time I look at my little boy, it’s like a knife in my heart, and I can’t stand it. I’d better go now – I’ll come and see you all again another day, I promise!” “I’ll give you a lift if you like” said Steve, taking his keys from his pocket. “You keep away from me!” snapped Jon, pushing past him. “Don’t you think you’ve done enough? Thanks to you, my little boy doesn’t even know me. I hope you’re both satisfied!” ”How are you going to get home?” “I’ll walk! In fact, I’d rather crawl than be near you for a minute longer!” “It’s raining, Jon” said Donna, putting her hand on his arm. “You’ll end up with pneumonia. Please, let Steve run you home.” “I always thought this was my home” he said, his eyes full of pain. “or has he taken that over, too? Stupid bloody question, really. He’s taken everything else, so why not?! Now get out of my way, before I do something I’ll regret.” Blinded by tears, he pushed her hand away, and walked out, shutting the door behind him. He was glad it was raining, because no one would notice the tears that were streaming down his face. His strength had still not returned after his recent spell in hospital, and the further he walked, the more it began to tell on him; his head was pounding, and his legs felt like lead. Once again, he would have to swallow his pride, and ask for help. He took his mobile from his pocket, with the intention of ringing Eliza, and asking her to come and get him, but when he tried to switch it on, the screen remained blank – the battery was flat. “Bugger” he said, under his breath, as he stuffed it back into his pocket. “Well, there’s only one thing for it, I’ll just have to keep walking, and if I get pneumonia – so bloody what! I just don’t give a monkey’s chuff any more!” When he eventually arrived at Eliza’s flat, he felt like he had run a marathon, and he was very close to collapsing. He closed the door behind him, and walked through to the living room; he was soaked to the skin, and shivering with the cold. Eliza looked up, a look of horror of her face, as he stood there in front her, quite unable to say a word. “Oh my God!” she said, clapping a hand to her mouth. “What happened to you? You’re soaked!” “Nothing wrong with your eyesight, is there?” he snapped, heading for the bathroom. “God, I need a shower! I’m freezing my assets off here!” Shrugging her shoulders, she went back to what she was doing, thinking that he would talk to her when he had calmed down a bit. About half an hour later, she heard footsteps behind her, and her eyes widened as she saw him standing there wearing nothing but a bath towel, and a rather embarrassed smile. “I forgot to get some more clothes” he said, his smile making her heart beat that little bit faster. “I can’t walk around wearing this towel all day!” “No” she agreed, her eyes glinting. “you’d better take it off!” With one swift movement, she reached out and whipped the towel from around his waist, and began to run towards the bedroom. “Eliza! Get back here! Give me that towel….” “Only if you say please!” she said, hiding it behind her back. “Come on, Eliza. I’m not in the mood, now give it back!” “You will be when I’ve finished with you!” she retorted, disappearing into the bedroom. He followed her into the bedroom, and shut the door behind him, trying in vain to cover his modesty. She grinned mischievously, then, still holding the towel, she walked slowly towards him. She wrapped the towel around his waist, and pulled him towards her. There was no warning as she suddenly put her arms around his neck, and firmly pressed her lips against his. To her utmost surprise, he tried to pull away. “No, Eliza, please…” “Oh don’t be shy! Come on, big boy! You know you want to!” “No, I don’t!” he snapped, pushing her hands away. “now, give me that bloody towel before I lose my temper!” “Jon! What’s got into you? What’s happened? Talk to me!” “Eliza! Please, just leave it! Just – just leave it…” With that, he turned his back on her, and pulled some clothes from a drawer. She sat on the bed, watching, as he dressed in total silence. Suddenly, she could stand it no longer. “Please, Jon” she said, her voice soft and gentle. “What’s wrong? It’s obvious that something’s bothering you. Come on, babe – let me help. Come here!” Her gentle words completely robbed him of his self-control, and he turned to face her, tears streaming down his face. Her heart ached as she watched him fighting to regain his composure. He looked for all the world like a little boy, who desperately wanted to cry, but was refusing to give in. His arms hung by his sides, as he clenched his fists in a gesture of silent defiance. She held out her hand, and watched as he slowly walked towards her, his shoulders shaking, his features contorted in pain. “It’s all right, sweetheart” she said, softly. “Come here, and let me give you a hug. Come on, it’ll be all right” She gently took him in her arms, and held him fast, as he sobbed with rage and frustration. She waited patiently, until the storm had passed, and he relaxed in her arms, his head resting on her shoulder. He began to speak, at first so softly that she could hardly hear him. “It’s all falling apart, Eliza” he whispered, his voice muffled by her shoulder. “I’ve lost my wife, now I’m losing my children….” “What do you mean? Your children love you so much, you’ll never lose them!” “I’ve lost one of them, already. My little boy doesn’t know me, Eliza. He thinks Steve is his daddy! He called him ‘daddy’, he didn’t even know who I was. When I tried to take him, he reached out for Steve. I don’t know what to do, Eliza. The thought of my little boy calling another man ‘daddy’ is tearing me apart! It’s breaking my heart, Eliza! I can’t stand it!” “Oh, my precious love” she said, gently stroking his hair, as she rocked him back and forth. “I can’t begin to imagine how you must feel; you must be in so much pain right now. Don’t give up hope – keep trying. Keep talking to him, tell him how much you love him – one day he’ll remember who you are. He will, I just know it. Hang in there, it’ll be worth it when he calls you ‘daddy’ instead of Steve. It won’t easy, but I’ll be with you every step of the way.” “What if he never realises who I am?” he said, looking up at her, tears rolling down his face. “There is a chance that he’ll never realise who I am, and I don’t think I could take it. I’ve been through some shit in the past, but this is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to face. I don’t think I can do it. I don’t think I can walk into my home, and watch my little girls’ faces light up, while my little boy looks at me as if I’m a stranger. It’s so hard, Eliza. Please, promise me you’ll be here for me. I need you so much right now, I’m so scared….” “I’m not going anywhere” she whispered, placing a feather light kiss on his forehead, pulling his head down to gently rest on her bosom. “I’ll be right here by your side, and I’ll get you through it, you’ll see. He will call you ‘daddy’ one day, I just know it. One day, something will happen to make him realise. Some little thing you say to him, or some special song you sing to him – something that only you know, and that little child will have stored it away in his memory, and when he hears it, he’ll know who you are. That will be a moment worth waiting for, and it will – just you wait and see.” “You’re such a comfort to me, Eliza” he said, wrapping his arms around her waist. “When you hold me, I feel so safe and warm, and completely at home. You’re my rock. I love you, Eliza.” She did not answer him, but just held him close. The road ahead was going to be hard, but if she had anything to do with it, he would make it. As all kinds of thoughts went through her mind, it suddenly occurred to her that there was one thing that would bring him more comfort that any other gesture she could ever make. She watched a look of contentment and peace flicker across his face, as she began to sing, her sweet voice gently lulling him to sleep… “In the arms of the angel, fly away from here…..”
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