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Poetry
Ashes in his grate
By Ladybird
07 June 2005

Ashes in his Grate

Loving words she wrote

fired passion in his heart.

Reached into his soul

fanned flames of desire.

Love burned so brightly

Until.

On plain paper one day she wrote

a single word to him,

'Goodbye'

Then the fire of love burned out

as ashes in his grate.

Reviews
ashes in his grate
Written by maipenrai (783 comments posted) 8th June 2005
this is a decent write, may i make a couple of suggestions? 
 
1.change of title 
2.leave it at "goodbye" 
 
Bernie
Ashes in his grate
Written by Ladybird (32 comments posted) 11th June 2005
Thanks maipenrai - I see what you mean about leaving it at 'goodbye' 
I was trying to get the impact of him burning the paper she wrote the goodbye on - it obviously did not have the impact I was going for. - Ladybird

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