Chapter 27

For a few minutes, save the sound of the birds singing outside the window, there was silence in the small room.  Donna glanced down at Jon – he was still holding on to her, his arms around her waist, his head still resting on her stomach.  Her heart ached as she thought of the hell he must have gone through, not knowing whether their baby had made it.  She knew that, God forbid, if the worst had happened, he would never have forgiven himself.

“Are you all right, love?” she said, stroking his hair  “you’ve gone very quiet!”

“I’m fine!” he said, standing up and looking out of the window. “I’m sorry, Donna! I’m so sorry!”

“What on earth for?  I’m fine, the baby’s fine – so you’ve got nothing to be sorry for!  Oh, love – why are you crying?”

“I was so scared, Donna!  I thought it was happening all over again!  It brought it all back – all the pain, all the guilt I was feeling!  I thought I was over it, but after what’s just happened it seems like it was only yesterday!  I suppose I was so busy feeling guilty, I didn’t give myself time to grieve properly!”

“It’s only natural to feel scared, but it’s over now!  I’ve had two perfect babies since then, so there’s no reason why I shouldn’t have another!  Little Emily is an added bonus!  Live for now, love!  You’ve got everything to look forward to!”

“I know!” he said, taking her hand  “It’s just that I feel so guilty, I….”

“That’s enough!” she said, softly “Why don’t you go and put your mum out of her misery?  If you’re going through hell, she must be going through it with you!”

As he closed the door to Donna’s room, he made his way down the winding corridors back to the waiting room.   He scanned the room for his mother – she was still in the same chair, holding an empty coffee cup in her hand.  As he drew closer, he could tell she had been crying.  She took one look at his tearstained face, and immediately thought the worst.

“Oh no, love!  Please, no…..”

“Mum!  It’s all right!” he said, holding her close  “They’re both fine!  A few bruises – but the baby’s fine!”

“But, you’ve been crying!”

“I was so relieved when I heard our baby’s heartbeat, I just couldn’t help myself!  You know what I’m like!”

“Yes, I do!  But I wouldn’t have you any other way, and I’m sure Donna feels the same!  When is she coming home?”

“When they’ve checked her over, she can come with us!  Shouldn’t be too long to wait now!”

They had planned to go to the on-site club that evening, but Donna had been told to rest, so they decided to leave it until tomorrow. After the children were in bed, they settled down in front of the TV, with a nice cup of tea.  They were sitting there talking, when Donna suddenly turned down the volume on the TV.

“What was that?” she said  “I thought I heard a noise!”

“I didn’t hear anything!”

“I heard it again!  It’s coming from Emily’s room! I’ll go and see if she’s all right!”

She went over to the door, and listened – but at the moment, there was silence, then she heard a muffled sob, and an anguished cry.

“Daddy!  Come here, daddy!  Please!”

As Donna returned to her place on the sofa, he got up and went into her room.  He quietly closed the door, and sat on her bed.  When she realised he there, she struggled to get up, sobbing uncontrollably.  Shocked, he took her in his arms, gently rocking her back and forth, until she had calmed down.

“Come on, Emily!” he said, stroking her hair  “Whatever’s the matter?  Are you still upset about the baby?  There’s really no need, because they’re fine – Donna and the baby!”

“It’s not that!” she wept, clinging on to him for dear life  “Do – do you still love me, daddy?”

“What kind of a question is that?” he said, the expression on her face nearly broke his heart there and then  “Of course I still love you!  What on earth made you think otherwise?”

“I was horrible to you!  I said it would be your fault if anything bad happened to mummy’s baby!  I made you cry!  I’m sorry, daddy – I’m really, really sorry!  If you don’t want me to be your little girl any more, I…..”

“Oh, Emily!”  He was close to tears now   “We all say things we don’t mean when we’re hurting!  You were upset because you thought mummy’s baby was hurt, and you just lashed out at the nearest person – which happened to be me!  I know you didn’t mean what you said.  I won’t pretend it didn’t hurt at the time, but I can understand why you said what you did – you were scared!  I was terrified, I don’t mind admitting it!  As for not being my little girl any more – don’t ever say that again!  I love you dearly, Emily – I always will!  Come on now – lie down and go to sleep. Forget about it – I have already!”

“Okay, daddy.  I love you!”

Almost before he could answer, she was asleep.  For a minute or two, he sat there looking at her.  Just how long had she been torturing herself about those bitter accusations she had made, in the heat of the moment?  It was incredible how a hug and a few gentle words of reassurance had eased her mind.

Much to the girls’ disappointment, they woke the next day to cloudy skies, and it became obvious that the rain was not going to let up – at least for a few hours.  Luckily, there were plenty of activities on the site to keep them amused – such as the indoor pool, and the amusement arcade.  Emily sat there mesmerised, as Jon racked up a phenomenal score on the pinball machine, laughing at his rendition of ‘Pinball Wizard’!

“Do you have to, daddy?” she said, raising her eyes heavenward  “Britney Spears was bad enough!  I never did rate her, personally!”

“Oh, really!” he said, trying not to laugh  “I thought it was rather good!”

“That only goes to show, then” she said, grinning broadly  “All those years at the Guildhall – they were obviously wasted on you!”

“Right, that’s it!” he said, as she began to giggle hysterically  “I’ve got no choice, I’m afraid!  I’m going to have to tickle you to within in an inch of your life!”

Upon hearing Emily’s squeals of laughter, Donna came over to see what was going on.  Rosie, never one to hold back, walked up to her daddy, and said:

“For goodness sake, daddy!  If you don’t behave, I’ll have to smack your bottom!”

As he stood there, almost crying with laughter, while Donna turned a very fetching shade of pink, two ladies walked past.  One of them glanced at Rosie, and said:

“Kids, eh?  Never a dull moment, is there!”

“You’re telling me!” said Donna, glancing at her husband  “I’ve got three small children, and one extra large one!”

“Don’t know what you mean!  Why don’t YOU smack my bottom?”

“Because you’d probably enjoy it!” she said, poking her tongue out at him  “Anyway, we’d better go back to the caravan, so Rosie and Clare can have a nap before we go to the club later on!”

Despite Rosie’s protests that she was too big for an afternoon nap, it was not long before she was fast asleep.  Later on that evening, they all made their way over to the club.  Emily and Rosie were chatting excitedly, while Clare sat in the buggy singing and blowing raspberries.  Once inside, they managed to find an empty table – the club was already fairly full.  The girls sat there contentedly munching on crisps, and drinking coke, whilst watching the magician, who kept their attention with trick after trick.  After yet another demonstration of his sleight of hand, there was a round of applause.  As it died down, there was a rather suspect noise from the table next to them.  However, unfortunately for Jon, Rosie’s sense of direction was somewhat suspect.  She looked at him accusingly.

“Daddy! You farted!”

“I did not!” he said, trying to keep a straight face  “don’t be so rude!”

“Sorry, mate!” said a man at the next table  “That was me!  She tells it like it is, doesn’t she?!”

“Unfortunately – yes!” he said, his face burning with embarrassment  “not always a good thing!”

“Sorry, daddy!” said Rosie, looking very contrite  “It sounded like one of yours!”

“There really is no answer to that!” said Donna, amid the gales of laughter that followed. 

Unbeknown to them, later on that evening, there was a talent contest, and, as they sat there listening to an assortment of singers, musicians, magicians etc., they thought some of them were rather good.  Rosie looked at Jon, and said:

“Why don’t you have a go, daddy?”

“No!” said Donna, before he could even draw breath  “It wouldn’t be fair!”

“Please, daddy!” said Rosie, sticking out her bottom lip  “Please sing, daddy!”

A lady at the next table, who clearly did not recognise him (that did not happen very often!), turned around and said:

“Is your daddy good at singing, sweetheart?”

“Yes!” said Rosie, proudly  “My daddy is an opera singer!”

“Is he really?” she said, her eyes widening   “Is he good?”

“Yes!  He’s the best singer in the world!” replied Rosie, emphatically.

“Well, in that case – I’d love to hear him sing!” said the lady, smiling at her, then her face fell  “Oh no!  The contest is over – it’s too late now!”

Rosie’s face fell – her lips trembled, and she began to cry.  Their table was fairly near the stage, and the compere heard her pitiful cries, as Donna tried to comfort her.  He asked her what was wrong.

“I wanted my daddy to sing!” she said, tears rolling down her face  “but the competition is over!  He can’t now, he can’t sing now….”

“I’ll tell you what” said the compere, her words going straight to his heart  “I know the competition is over, but daddy can still sing if he wants to!  How’s that?”

“All right!” he said, holding up his hands in resignation  “I’ll sing – if only to keep you quiet!”

He took to the stage, and thought for a moment.  One of the musicians spoke up.

“What are you going to sing then, mate?”

“It’s okay” he said  “I don’t need any music!”

A lot of the people in the club did not know he was there, so it came as a complete surprise.  As that glorious tenor that so many people loved so well, began to soar, a hush fell over the entire room.  As he sang a song made famous by the late, great Mario Lanza, his eyes came to rest upon Donna, every word he uttered was meant just for her.

”Be my love
For no one else can end this yearning
This need that you and you alone create
Just fill my arms
The way you've filled my dreams
The dreams that you inspire
With every sweet desire

Be my love
And with your kisses set me burning
One kiss is all I need to seal my fate
And hand in hand
We'll find love's promised land
There'll be no one but you for me
Eternally
If you will be my love”

As the final notes rang out, there was a few seconds’ hush, then, almost as one, everyone in the room rose to their feet, clapping and cheering.  Some of them had tears rolling down their faces.  As he went back to his seat, the lady who had been speaking to Rosie, said to him:

“The last time I heard a voice like that, I was listening to Mario Lanza!  That was beautiful, my dear!  Absolutely beautiful!”

“Thank you!” he said, feeling his eyes fill with tears at the expression on her face.

As he lay there in bed that night, watching his wife sleeping peacefully beside him, a wonderful feeling suddenly came over him.  For a moment, he tried to work out what the feeling was, then he realised – it was peace and contentment, and it was wonderful.