EXT: ARCTIC TUNDRA. Frozen barren landscape stretches for miles, while harsh snow whips and dances through the air. In the midst, we focus on a small Arctic RESEARCH BASE.

INT: RESEARCH BASE. Amid shelves full of boxes of research equipment, huddle two researchers, FAT and THIN, nursing (by now obligatory) steaming cups of cocoa  and staring out into the frosty snowscape beyond. FAT is quiet and irritable, while THIN is compelled to fill silences.

FAT "I spy with my little eye, something beginning with S"

THIN (quickly) "Snow"

FAT "Yup! Your go"

Unnoticed behind them, the exterior door opens and a large polar bear enters. It starts looking through a shelf of foodstuffs looking for something tasty. FAT and THIN are totally unaware.

Thin "I spy with my little eye something beginning with P"

FAT "Polar bear?"

At this, the polar bear behind them suddenly stops and looks over.

THIN "Nope"

FAT "Aaah! Penguin!"

The polar bear shrugs and continues it's search.

THIN "Yeah!"

FAT "I spy with my little eye, something beginning with......mmm.....I"

At this point the bear, having piled several boxes into an armful, exits the room and quietly closes the door.

THIN "Icicle?"

FAT "Yep"

THIN "Christ! It's bloody boring here, isn't it?"

FAT "Yeah, nothing *ever* happens"

Fade.

End