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Great Writing - Home > Comedy > Antartic Quickie-Sketch Four
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Comedy
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| Antartic Quickie-Sketch Four | |
| By GertrudePerkins | ||||
| 13 June 2005 | ||||
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Artic, Antartic, whatever. As long as there's penguins and polar bears, I don't care! Here's another. If I'm boring you, tell me to stop!
EXT: ANTARCTIC TUNDRA. Frozen barren landscape stretches for miles, while harsh snow whips and dances through the air. In the midst, we focus on a small Antarctic RESEARCH BASE. INT: RESEARCH BASE. The interior is not as before. There are balloons hanging up and paper chains festooning the ceiling. THIN wears a paper hat and has a large badge pinned to his parka with the words ‘Birthday Boy' emblazoned upon it. FAT is busying himself at a vertical revolving spit of the sort used by kebab vans. The spit is empty but the burner behind glows yellow.
FAT "Right, the grill's ready! Time for the main course! Would you be so kind?"
THIN nods and leaves the room. We hear some awful high pitched squealing. THIN reappears with a dead penguin under his arm. He hands it to FAT who deftly removes the head, feet and flippers with swift strokes of a long thin knife. He turns his back to us and we see him doing something complicated to the remains (some spiffy camera work here!) With his back still turned and the body shielded from our view, we see him toss aside a black and white hide. When next we see the couple, a large ovoid object is roasting happily on the spit (so that's where they come from..)
Slicing meat off the carcass, FAT turns to THIN
FAT "Chilli sauce?"
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