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Poetry
The Cafe
By amanda4uk
11 January 2007
On a hot day like today I should be standing on

Cool old flag stones, in a beautiful house, eating an orange.

From the window I’d see white butterflies on cabbages,

Dancing about in the bright summer sun.


Instead I am here, at work in the cafe, melting over a stove,

The radio’s loud and the fan isn’t working, I wish I was home.

The smell of the rubbish outside comes through the window

And chokes me, two wasps buzz angrily around ready to attack.


Tonight I shall sleep deeply and sink into the silence,

The morning light will gently surround me, waking me softly.

Under the shower my eyes will feel wide open once again,

After breakfast I’ll take the ferry across to the Island, alone.

Reviews
hmm
Written by no1butClo (341 comments posted) 11th January 2007
I like your imagery, but it seems unfinshed. These three stanzas sound like the beginning of a story, I'd love to read on! But well done 
 
clo x

Written by Phil (6963 comments posted) 11th January 2007
With Clo on this one. They do feel like the introduction to something bigger. Not sure if this is prose or poetry or somewhere inbetween. I thought the first verse pretty effective at building a scene (imaginary) and feeling. 
 
Phil.

Written by ellipinnock (1786 comments posted) 11th January 2007
Liked this, it feels soothin although, like the others, it felt like prose to me and like the introduction to something. Enjoyed the scene though. 
 
Elli

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