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Poetry
Bubble
By maipenrai
20 January 2007
Fiction Folks !!!!

I have this bubble deep inside my head
it makes me think strange, strange thoughts
someday soon it will burst
then I will be dead.

Reviews

Written by Fledermaus (3448 comments posted) 20th January 2007
How dark! 
The second line didn't realy work, but for the rest, eventhough the rythm is strange, it seemed to flow.
bubble
Written by maipenrai (784 comments posted) 20th January 2007
Thanks for your comments and for taking the time. 
 
Bernie
Hi MPR
Written by BrianRobertNeal (1195 comments posted) 20th January 2007
I have to agree with batty-Boy re line two. What about 
 
"it makes me think oddly strange thoughts" 
 
I meant well, I'll get me coat, cheque please, 
 
Brian.
bubble
Written by maipenrai (784 comments posted) 21st January 2007
Thanks Brian, you can stay mate, i will get the bill later!!! :) :)

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