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Sickest

By tabarejos

22 January 2007

As i wrote this poem I was aware of my sin, thus the title. This was made specifically for someone so I guess not everyone will like it, probably even the person I wrote it for.

"two unknowing Goths" my two classmates who sat between me and my crush, who didn't know anything

"motley nonsymbolics" the whole damn class

"so technically" the class was technical writing

that is all.

        One look was all it took
        And all else anxious shook
        And senses forgotten
        From love misbegotten
        And nowhere going
        From me to you flowing
        Through two unknowing Goths
        My love it's you it clothes
        And nourishes me with hunger
        Further pulled asunder
        Among motley nonsymbolics
        Is it automatically erratic
        To love in spite of me
        You so technically?
        Sullied by your purity
        The familiar rarity
        I so much love
        Why not let flood?
        Nothing I mistook
        It only took one look.

Reviews

Written by Fledermaus (3281 comments posted) 22nd January 2007

Short lines and many of them rhyme. This one would do nice on rap music I guess. It's only a pity that from goths-clothes to nonsymbolics-erratic the rhyme wasn't as pure as in the first lines.

Written by Phil (6713 comments posted) 22nd January 2007

Does this start with a quote from a song?

This one is not for me I'm afraid. Its erratic pattern and almost random rhyms made for a pretty unfulfilling read.

Still, can't please everybody all of the time.

Phil.

Written by Phil (6713 comments posted) 22nd January 2007

Sp: rhymes - sorry.

No it doesnt
Written by tabarejos (21 comments posted) 22nd January 2007

No it doesn't start with a quote from a song...=)

now that i thought of it, i never really have written any poem with a regular rhyme pattern haha

filipino ka pala eh. hai...basta....
Written by milz (35 comments posted) 6th February 2007

anyhow. San ka sa Philippines? talagang Philippines ba tlaga country mo or not?
basta...pinag-aaralan kasi namin ang poetry sa reading..and may tawag na nonsense poetry..hai..alam mo ba un? basta hindi dhil..basta... :grin

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