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By Phil
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27 January 2007 |
High school, early eighties. First Love #6 Lisa
Bubbly, flame haired Lisa,
Me, a moth to the light.
Friendship never enough for either.
A full fledged fling
Was not the thing.
Never quite mine
Her kiss though – divine. |
Ahhhh...
Written by Talisker (1328 comments posted) 26th January 2007 | How a simple thing can revive the soul!
Bless!
Oli |
Written by rilLie (327 comments posted) 27th January 2007 | wow.. nice..  looking forward to number 7. :D |
Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 27th January 2007 | | Phil, I really like this. And those first two lines are, for me, simply brilliant. 'Me a moth to the light' -- ah, those were the days. |
Written by JourneyAtNight (314 comments posted) 27th January 2007 | Lovely, lovely! As Witzl said - great first two lines.
I'm rather enjoying this little journey you're taking us on!
E |
Written by ellipinnock (1753 comments posted) 27th January 2007 | I loved this - really strong image - now I try to avoid doing this but the first 2 lines are screaming out to me to be rearranged to:
Me, a moth to the light
of bubbly flame-haired Lisa
or a variation on that theme...couldn't tell you why - i may be talking complete bollocks!
Either way I really enjoyed this one.
Elli |
Written by francoise (129 comments posted) 27th January 2007 | Agree with Elli here about the first two lines... and I couldnt tell you why either....so we could both be talking bollocks!
loved this piece, sweet and gentle with an achingly romantic last line.
nice piece
Fran |
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