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By Phil
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28 January 2007 |
High school, early eighties. First Love #8 Sam Sensual, sensible,
Samantha.
In her I sought sanctuary
From Kathryn, but
In unwrinkled stretch denim
She strode out of my life
For someone less deserving.
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Written by kevg (45 comments posted) 28th January 2007 | Another good one.
Interesting idea for a series of poems - and I like how you give a mention to Kathryn in this one to give the poems a sense of concept.
Good use of alliteration at the start, and in the first line of the main stanza. The denim image works well too, showing a good turn of phrase.
The last line is the best. Suggests bitternes, and I read it with a pinch of irony too.
Thanks for the read.
KevG
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Written by Talisker (1320 comments posted) 28th January 2007 | She sells sanctuary, on the seashore???
She strode by me in painted-on jeans do do do do do do...
Agree with Kev, I like - how come you were such a stud-muffin?
Jealous Oli
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Written by rilLie (327 comments posted) 28th January 2007 | | lol.. reading number 9.. |
Written by ellipinnock (1753 comments posted) 29th January 2007 | Liked this one - that last line hurts...
Elli | good depiction
Written by SKETCHY (3 comments posted) 13th January 2008 | | of someone walking out on your life, for someone who doesn't nearly love her as much as you do. |
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