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DISCHORD
By cordialfreedom
01 February 2007
hello, i tend to write straight from the heart and the head, Ididn`t intend to go on an anti bigot rant, it just came out. I hope you get my point and that there aren`t too many stupid people reading this[i`m sure you`re not]

why is the world looking at me?
doesn`t it know how much i wish
it would love me
but when it looks at me like that i don`t think it ever will

i try so hard to fall in line
but i never seem to be able
to follow the herd
the ones who care enough to change their very soul
to fit in

NO stuff it
why should i
i want to be myself
to be anything but like you
i dont care about football
i dont care
about
your anti immigrant rant
i dont care about the clothes iwear
i dont care about any of the stuff i should

your self obsessed diatribes about why everybody would be better off
if they were just like you
with no faults
wrong gender
wrong sex
wrong type of sex
wrong race
wrong religion
wrong subsect of wrong religion

why do you care
whats it got to do with you
have they hurt you
have they
stolen your cat
have they married your goldfish

to quote anti nowhere league
SO F@@KIN WHAT

why cant you just take people as you find them
just take people as you find them
he`s not a dick because he`s gay
he`s just a dick.

Reviews
Age barriers
Written by Marybarry (237 comments posted) 1st February 2007
Greetings cordialfreedom, 
 
I am pretty useless at modern poetry, But I am trying to learn. 
I was brought up in the rhyming times. 
 
But the raw emotion ,anger and social conscience you display in this piece is astounding. 
It didn't speak to me, it SHOUTED and GOOD SO. 
 
I cannot judge the construction of your poem but the content is VERY GOOD. 
Congratulations.marybarry
Dischord
Written by pasinger (13 comments posted) 1st February 2007
Frustration, anger. this was a real rant. 
It has drama and emotion. 
it asks a relevant question why can't we look at people and see the good in them and not always want to dwell on the negative. 
The english were always such optomistic people.  
Now we have politically correct? I don't have a clue, I was away when they discovered this sentence and put it into everyday speech. 
Good points made in this work. Asking what we build our society on. What happened to standards and morals. 
good read 
pasinger

Written by Phil (6393 comments posted) 1st February 2007
A real rant. I actually quite enjoyed it. Pretty sure there's not much poetry there, but worth the read all the same. Liked the last two lines a lot. 
 
Phil.

Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 2nd February 2007
To be perfectly blunt with you, this falls into the category of what I call 'art as therapy.' I agree with Phil that there isn't much poetry here. But I absolutely know what you are talking about and I very much like it: I'll bet you've been spending time around some of the people I know, and we may even be related. Just joking, of course; the kind of people this piece is addressed to are sadly everywhere.  
 
Those last two lines of yours really are brilliant. I'd say make the first part sound more poetic -- keep the message, but restructure the language -- and you will have a gem.

Written by francoise (129 comments posted) 2nd February 2007
agree with Witzl and Phil on this one.. non existent punctuation too some of the sentences had a dark and surreal sense of humour to it (pretty sure you didnt intend to do that but asking whether your cats been stolen or not sounds quite funny to me..) I also enjoyed the last two lines. Overall your blunt form of expression has poetic potential..somewhere..:-) 
 
Fran

Written by cordialfreedom (3 comments posted) 3rd February 2007
thanks for the reviews guys,you`re right it isn`t strictly poetry just freeform frustration.I`ve got a dark and surreal sense of humour anyway, as you can obviously tell. 
thanks again. 

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