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Dead Men's Shoes: Part Two

By ellipinnock

02 February 2007

Now you see why I didn't want to post all three poems together. Same starting point for each of them but they all ended up very different.

Had to work hard to edit this so that it actually made sense - have I managed it?

This falcon faltered flying home, destined
for second best, wings pinioned
by relentless claustrophobic cold.

Cramping fingers scrawled out
your mounting despair,
the finality of your predicament
and, reading, I too feel
the frozen polar embrace
like a knife at my throat
and wonder at your acceptance.

Did you fear you'd be Scott of nothing at all?

Reviews

Too big for his boots!!
Written by Marybarry (237 comments posted) 2nd February 2007

Hi Ellipinnock,
This one was very different, I enjoyed it.
I loved the last line Scott of nothing at all.

marybarry

Written by Fledermaus (3488 comments posted) 2nd February 2007

Going to read the others for I didn't understand a thing of this one...

Written by Fledermaus (3488 comments posted) 2nd February 2007

After your PM I read it again and I must say it's great, but it certainly is a bit of a riddle.

Written by Phil (6963 comments posted) 2nd February 2007

Got it on the second try Elli - so it must be reasonably transparent or I'd still be mulling it over now. The last line seals this one for me and gives it its depth.

Feeling chilly.

Phil.

Dead Men's Shoes part 2
Written by CliffBowes (176 comments posted) 3rd February 2007

Hi Elli,
I think that Robert Falcon Scott would have been very pleased if he could have read these words, perhaps he would have changed part of the last sentence of his diary from 'rough notes' to 'beautiful notes'
The pun of his middle name in the opening line is a brilliant touch.
I loved it.

Hi Elli
Written by jean.day (2366 comments posted) 3rd February 2007

Certainly a very different poem from the first one - but I liked it too. I get the impression of Mrs. Scott writing this, rather annoyed as well as devastated by her husband's non return - thinking that he couldn't face being second best. Thinking that his suicide would put him in the history books.

Written by fellpony (1717 comments posted) 5th February 2007

Hi Elli

I'd have titled it more clearly, I think - but omitted the last line. Perhaps that thought can be expressed less obviously, if his name is in the title?

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