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For Children
Station Road - Chapter 6
By Phil
07 February 2007
The story so far: Ted's wife died. Moved to Station Road. Street is full of snobs who all dislike the Grimson family. Ted strikes up a friendship with Grimson child -Billy. Shows Billy precious necklace. Necklace goes missing. Read on.

This Chapter seems a bit static, but it's short and necessary.

Chapter 6.

This is the part of the story that I’m going to find really hard to tell.  There are two reasons for this.  The first is, when I think back to it, I still feel almost as upset and as sick as I did then.  The second reason is even worse, but I’ll come to that later.

 As I told you, I had decided I was never going to set foot inside that vicar’s church again for what he said about Billy.  So this particular Sunday I walked a good mile and a half to go to Saint Augustine’s.  Even though it was further away from home, it was closer to the cemetery, so it wasn’t too much extra walking for me.

 After the service I walked over to the graveyard to put some fresh flowers on Elsie’s marker.  This sounds a bit funny, but it was a bit like a club that cemetery.  Every week you’d see the same old faces paying their respects.

 “’Ow do Ted?” called old Alf.

 I could call him old Alf because as old as I am, he was old enough to be my father.

 “Fine Alf.  And you?”  I replied.

 “Doin’ okay.  See you next week.”

And he was off.  Back to his flat for a lonely lunch I suppose.

Now even though I missed Elsie very much, I was never one for moping around.  Life’s too short to be wasting it being miserable, especially at my time of life.  But this particular Sunday I couldn’t help myself.  It was beginning to get me down that my neighbours didn’t seem particularly friendly.  They were certainly not the sort of people Elsie would have enjoyed spending time with.  She never had a bad word to say about anyone and avoided people who talked behind other’s backs.

 “You never know when they’ll start on you,” she used to say.

I don’t suppose that would have bothered me that much if it wasn’t for Billy.  I really thought I’d made a friend there and I liked him very much, but I was worried that I’d said the wrong thing and upset him the day before.

When I got home I was tired.  It’s not every day a chap my age walks so far.  I was still feeling a bit maudlin and started looking through a few old photographs.  One thing led to another and I was soon thinking about the necklace and diamond I’d given to Elsie all those years ago.  I thought I’d go and have a look at it, so I got up and went to the sideboard to get the jewellery box.

My stomach lurched and it was a good job it was so long since breakfast or I might have been sick.  I looked where it should have been and then quickly scanned the rest of the sideboard.  No box.  Well, as you can imagine, I was frantic.  I searched the whole house from top to bottom, but even as I was doing it I knew I wouldn’t find anything.  I knew it should have been on the sideboard and I knew I hadn’t moved it.  At last I gave up.  I’m not ashamed to say that I sat down and wept.  Not for the worth of what had gone missing, but for the sentimental value.  Elsie had really loved that necklace and it was the only classy thing I’d ever been able to buy her.

When I finally got a grip on myself and stopped crying I started to get angry.  Who was the worthless little thief who had stolen it?

I knew.  It could only be one person.  Billy Grimson.  He probably did it while I was out in the kitchen getting the biscuits the day before.  No wonder he left looking a bit sheepish.  I can tell you, I was almost ready for murder.

Reviews

Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3331 comments posted) 8th February 2007
As you say,Phil a bit static but an important development in the plot. I'm not sure how you get round that,except, maybe, by cutting to another character and some more action and back again. It often helps if you have two strands of action going and alternate between the two. 
The emotional content was high so it isn't a big problem here,I think. The style and tone are pretty consistent and you have definitely cranked the the plot up a notch 
cheers 
J
Hi Phil
Written by jean.day (2266 comments posted) 10th February 2007
I'm disappointed in Ted. For all his championing of Billy before, as soon as something goes wrong, he jumps to the same conclusion as the other neighbours would have. There were two boys in the house for tea. He should at least think about whether the other boy could have done it. 
 
I know, this is all probably part of the plot, but as I have been sort of identifying with Ted, being the same sort of age and all, I want him to be a good guy. So when you sort it out, make sure he is thoroughly ashamed of himself.

Written by Phil (6683 comments posted) 10th February 2007
It's not his fault Jean - I made him do it. Don't worry, he'll feel his guilt and make amends. 
 
Thanks for the comments. 
Phil.

Written by ellipinnock (1753 comments posted) 10th February 2007
Started reading this thinking that the pace had dropped a little and that the plot needed to move on and lo and behold it did! Just the right time for things to start getting interesting I reckon. I see what you mean now when you said earlier that getting Hugh into ted's house felt awkward - in retrospect I think you're right. 
 
I think it adds depth to Ted's character to have him prejudge Billy and then (one assumes) go through the guilt and change his opinion. 
 
However, unless you've got some surprising tricks up your sleeve - always possible - you're going to have to be careful that the plot direction doesnt become too obvious or that the story becomes too moralistic. Sure you'll pull it off! Looking forward to developments. 
 
Elli

Written by Gill21 (566 comments posted) 20th March 2007
Was feeling that the pace was quite slow up until now but this chapter really shifts the story up a gear. Very interesting how his mind went straight to Billy as he liked him, and didn't like the other boy that was in his house. The change in tone made for a gripping read also. You said that the story was for primary school children? The way it's going i'd say it'd have to be for the older ones though.
Oh No!
Written by Josie (2780 comments posted) 15th July 2007
I'm sure he's made a mistake. It would have been another boy, surely!

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