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Ennui
By francoise
10 February 2007
a quick one, wrote this after realising I hadnt watched the box in weeks... went to update myself with good ol' BBC world news.. and I suddenly felt like this.......Fran


'Employment levels are at a five year low.'

The newsreader is wearing beige tonight
He speaks with  a calm clarity,
pouring out clean words. 
Grainy shots of friendly fire,
Luminous green spots in the sky,
Slivers of white against gold
Dark terrain. Winter evening. 

Back to the studio.
The click of a boiling kettle.
I turn away from the screen,
and finish the second cup of tea.
With a dry tongue I contemplate
This waste of lived in space.

The quick mutter of 'Jesus Christ'
and a sigh of relief.
Two minutes of empathy
Abbreviated into another tea.

Reviews

Written by Phil (6393 comments posted) 10th February 2007
And so the world turns and we all do nothing. Not a condemnation of you Fran, I'm just as bad. 
 
This one made me think for a bit, so well done. 
 
Phil.

Written by Marybarry (237 comments posted) 11th February 2007
What would we do without our tea? 
I liked it. I am one of those who do nothing. 
My excuse is not having any children who can accuse me, 
about the state of the world. marybarry 8) :x

Written by ellipinnock (1753 comments posted) 12th February 2007
Mixed feelings about this. Like some of it very much. Going to come back later when I've got time to review properly. 
 
Elli

Written by francoise (129 comments posted) 13th February 2007
thanks for the comments.. 
 
Fran :)

Written by ellipinnock (1753 comments posted) 13th February 2007
Righto - I love some of the ideas in this and it really made me think (in a good way!) 
 
I'm not sure if you need the first line - it's very prosy and makes for confusion in the transition from employment figures to (I assume) a war correspondent. 
 
I liked grainy shots and green spots - lovely imagery. Couldn't quite tie the slivers of white and gold into that though. 
 
The next bit that catches me a little is, 'this waste of lived-in space' - feels like a very personal thought and I feel like it needs a little bit of qualification/explanation for the general reader... 
 
I like the idea of the final couplet but I'm not sure about 'abbreviated'... 
 
Overall though I thought it a very good idea :)  
 
Elli

Written by francoise (129 comments posted) 15th February 2007
thanks Elli for taking the time to comment. I'll come back to responding better with more time.. (I'll probably PM you) 
 
cheers 
 
Fran

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