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By deathstillness
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14 February 2007 |
just something I thought about while I was sitting alone in here! The day I waited came But you did not I wonder what's holding you Time passing so fast I am running out of reasons But oh, I will be waiting still I want to see you I am quite disperate I need you, just cannot let you go Oh no! Not yet! |
Ummm... Written by flook123 (35 comments posted) 14th February 2007 | Before everyone collapses in a heap laughing I should change ' disperate ' to ' desperate ', otherwise you will be accused of being all over the place. That apart it does have a simplicity that is quite beguiling. | Written by Phil (6635 comments posted) 14th February 2007 | Okay. I suggest you read Josie's poem about what makes a poem and, more importantly, the responses that followed. In the spirit of honesty, I couldn't say this was poetry. While I admire your grasp of English, that doesn't mean you can compose poetry in it. Keep trying though. Phil. (Is this the kind of review we want on the poetry forum?) |
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