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Poetry
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My Beautiful Boy
By vdubber
15 February 2007
my first effort at a bit of poetry, this is just a first draft all comments welcomed.

Better than any morning call,
from cock, or clock or birdsong.
Always up before the sun,
luxurious, selfish sleeps lamented.
The day a mix of naps and tantrums,
mischevious smiles and cheeky grins.
Constant awareness wares us out.
Evening is wished for, and invited in,
welcomed home like a long lost friend.
Then, bedtime comes,
relief is found.
A time to sit, catch breath and reflect
and watch while,
pink, plump, and protected,
my son, soothed, is soundly sleeping,
draped in duvet, deep in dreams.
My beautiful baby boy.

Reviews

Written by Marybarry (237 comments posted) 15th February 2007
A lovely tribute to your son. 
 
I'm not competent enough to comment on style, but I loved the content. 
Your first poem??? keep composing. 
marybarry :) :)

Written by LynB (435 comments posted) 15th February 2007
Lovely poem - it really touched me. Took back to the days when I cradled my son in my arms. He is now nearly 15, and almost six feet tall, but I'll never forget those first wonderful days. :)

Written by Talisker (1326 comments posted) 15th February 2007
A very creditable first effort. 
 
Just a few nits - "selfish sleep lamented" ? not sure what you mean by this. 
 
"Wares" - wears 
 
A nice, sweet, heartfelt poem. Enjoyed. 
 
Oli  
 
:)

Written by vdubber (5 comments posted) 15th February 2007
Thanks for your nice comments, "selfish sleep lamented", refers to no more self indulgent lie-ins at the weekend, or any other time come to think of it. When you have very young children, you have to get up when they do, and in my sons case, usually before 6am, hence I really really really miss sleeping late at the weekend. :cry

Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 15th February 2007
Mine are 15 and 12, and I get to sleep until 8:00 sometimes now. But they STILL keep me up at night, and if I could just find their pediatricians, I would definitely give them a piece of my mind. The good doctors used to swear to me that my girls would 'settle down' soon. But I'm told that my kids are unusual in their sleeplessness; you will no doubt get your weekend sleep ins back earlier than I did. 
 
And for what it is worth, I got 'selfish sleep lamented' straight away.

Written by JourneyAtNight (314 comments posted) 15th February 2007
This is lovely, and great for a first attempt, your inspiration no doubt very powerful. I liked this a lot. 
 
Keep them coming :) 
 
E

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