That it should come to this:
he leaves you because you try to kill him in your sleep.
You say you don't, you say you
aren't aware, but
it's true - they've done all the tests.
It has a long name, your condition,
and while there is absolutely nothing wrong with your relationship,
and while you two are so totally rightly justifiably made for each other,
and while there isn't exactly a known cure, if it wasn't for the killing thing, my guess is you'd make the cover of Gay Couples Monthly,
or Cemented. It's just this killing business
which is causing concern. You see,
or rather, you don't - while you are sleeping, you
grip his neck and squeeze hard
as if it's breaking you want to do. Every night -
it's been like that since the night you met.
All it takes to get you off him, though,
is a sharp jab to the ribs, and you roll over, growling.
Inevitably, though, he always wakes clamped in the crook
of your elbow, and you, with a bruise somewhere.
He hasn't complained much, well - you know,
and would have said something sooner
but, like you, felt you two belonged, especially
because, during the day, you make him feel so wanted.
(Crying innocence is all and well and will, no doubt,
garner some sympathy - everyone can see how much you love him.)
Watch him walk away with marks around his neck,
looking back because even he's not sure,
and when he's gone, and his side of the bed stretches
before you like a prison sentence, know this:
it's not the daily loving that drove him away -
it was the nightly murder that he could not endure.

(c) Alan David Pritchard