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Poetry
Hipswell Village Green
By CliffBowes
22 February 2007
My bay window with chair overlooks the village green with its church and trees. I sometimes sit and watch the passers by, the weddings, the funerals and the kids going to school. Sad old b*****d aren't I. Do you think I should get out more?



I watch from my window, absorbing  the scene.
A small world confined to our village green.
Two joggers, mud stained, break into a trot;
iPod engrossed, breathing hard at their lot.
A bairn with his Dad kicks goals like a winner,
His Mam stay at home to cook Sundays dinner.
A string a believers to the old church wend,
To pay homage and talk to their imaginary friend.
Into the church like a string of black crows,
They nod to a man whose sadness just grows,
Holding some flowers, an appointment to keep
With his wife, in the churchyard, no need to weep.
She’s at rest now, no pain, no growing older
I’m part of this scene, not just the beholder.

Reviews

Written by Phil (6387 comments posted) 22nd February 2007
You live in a lovely part of the world. As Givitsum, a regular poster, once told me: I'm a Yorkshireman doing missionary work in Lancashire. 
 
As I was reading this I was thinking it was a pleasant, easy and amusing read, and then the end gave it a more serious note. Simple and effective.  
 
Line six: you have a wandering s. The one at the end on 'Sunday' belongs to 'stay.' (I think) 
Also: A sting of believers? 
 
Enjoyed. It really captures a moment - several actually. 
 
Phil.
Hipswell
Written by Josie (2496 comments posted) 22nd February 2007
How I enjoyed your lovelypoem, and what a nice village you live in. I found the following website with beautiful photographs, including the village green, and I am sure you can see your window on the photos: 
 
http://www.pbase.com/poetry666/image/52142804  
 
I think your poem would be better if you divided it into verses though. Just a small comment. Did you mean: "A string of believers"? I think so. Easily corrected. Well done!
Hello Cliff
Written by Kathy (220 comments posted) 22nd February 2007
I think that the others have noticed a few flaws helpfully for you... I love the sentiments behind your poetry and try to show those in my own... Regards, Kathy

Written by Talisker (1300 comments posted) 22nd February 2007
Forget the little errors, this is a nice little cameo of a lovely village and the gentle pace of life there. 
 
Enjoyed it very much Cliff, thanks. 
 
Oli :)
Hipswell Village Green
Written by CliffBowes (176 comments posted) 23rd February 2007
Many thanks to all who have responded to my poem. Thanks for the website Josie, I didn't break the poem into verses as it was written in the English Sonnet style of 14 lines, but I do see your point. All the remarks concerning my terrible typing errors have been noted and acted upon. 
If you would like to see a few pictures of the Green please check out my website. 
 
http://www.cliffbowes.supanet.com

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