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Sonnets for a Blue Screen
By patterjack
05 March 2007
Having been  involved with serious sonnets just lately ,I decided to change tone a little.

The  following two are an experiment  - a  jocular  one - first a regular sonnet ,  two quatrains  and a sestet with the last two lines rhyming  -  then  the  second  one  with  the  form  reversed.

They are not in regular iambic pentameter ,  and should be read aloud , in a  conversational  tone , and with all possible enjambement of lines , like an actor rattling  them  off. 

Changed  the  title   and  an edit

  Sonnets for a blue  screen  

Shin-eqi-unninni  plunged stylus into clay
his  wedges told  the  tale of the  mighty  king
bestriding the  whole  world  of  his  ancient   day :
Gilgamesh  , of whose deeds  the  poets  sing.

Who wrote down blind old Homer's epic tales ?
No-one can tell , nor yet can any prove
if he was one or many; reason  fails
to deconstruct that classic treasure trove.

Blind Milton too, had daughters to record
his vision of the fall to the pits of Hell,
of Lucifer,thrust by Gabriel's fierysword ,
but who took with him all humankind as well . 

But nowadays , I who sit before this screen
have only the button  delete  to wipe it clean .


The words on the screen are wandering about  
like drunken soldiers ,following a rout .

There seems no logic in their choked farrago ,
their melange of black letters ,just a rag-bag 
demanding to be sounded , lente, largo,
expressing important moments of which to brag.

They arrange themselves in sentences, imprecise ,
conveying little, or nothing, when set down  , 
suggesting agenda which do not suffice,
for other than bringing the reader a puzzled frown .

With ever increasing speed as they splatter the page
they accomplish no more than confusion to my senses 
and I cannot match my pace with their solemn rage :
I need a patient, skilled amanuensis  .

Reviews
Loved it...
Written by mishmish (389 comments posted) 5th March 2007
Oh Brian, this was really, really good... 
 
Anything that can work in the Sumerian/Akkadian cunieform writers with Homer, Milton and the modern day, and then taking it all the way back to requesting a 'slave to dictate to!' is just sheer genius. 
 
I just loved the elements expressed, the juxtapostion between how the greats were captured and the meaningless aspects of modern day scribing. 
 
A lunch time treat...! Thank you. 
 
With best wishes 
 
Mish x

Written by Fledermaus (3238 comments posted) 5th March 2007
Oh wow, a sonnet. How I like poems written according to a tradional system. Not that I usually recognize them, but it's an art on its own. 
As for the content: I liked the references to those ancient myths/poems and how they differed from you. It's all very true. I could use such a peson too, as I'm always reluctant to press the right button...

Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 5th March 2007
This made me laugh, Brian -- especially the line about bringing the reader a puzzled frown. It is fun to have amusing themes done up in classic structures, (though I wouldn't know iambic pentameter even if it bit me on the butt).  
 
I don't want an amanuensis myself, but could use someone to bring me the odd cup of tea or get the laundry in when it rains.  
 
And imagine it the other way around -- what Shakespeare could have managed if he'd had a word processor. It doesn't bear thinking about.
thanks people
Written by patterjack (1159 comments posted) 5th March 2007
They were for fun -- and quite enjoyable to write for once ! 
 
patterjack
Sonnets for a Blue Screen
Written by Josie (2732 comments posted) 5th March 2007
Really good Brian. You've gone back as far as you can go in the recording of words. The language he wrote in must have been somewhat unintelligible - - - - well, not unlike that of some of my students of Pitman's Shorthand were. Ah well - - - - And as for you. Well, the words don't just appear on the screen. There's a man who has put in a lot of thought, as we all know, who's at the back of them. Liked this a lot Brian.

Written by Phil (6635 comments posted) 5th March 2007
Enjoyed these Brian. Engaging and clever pieces. Am I the only one who has noticed you want a patient scribe? 
 
I'm with Witzl. I don't so much need a scribe as someone to do all the little jobs that distract me - and fetch me tea/coffee/beer. 
 
Phil.
more reflections?
Written by fellpony (1575 comments posted) 6th March 2007
I liked the reversed pattern of the two sonnets. I think you might wait a very long time for a patient AND skilled amanuensis, though Delius was lucky enough to find Eric Fenby, so perhaps the job is not yet a dead loss ;)

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