Just a bit of childish nonsense, a little impromptu stocking filler written out of sheer boredom.

Mr. Stuart Arse (though his surname, however unfortunate, isn't relevant) is at a job interview with the GM of a company called 'Cliches Unlimited'.

GM: Hello Stuart, and pleased to meet you. Please, have a seat..

Stu: Pleased to meet you too, thank you.

GM: Now then, first off let me tell you a bit about myself and the job. I'm the General Manager here at Cliche's Unlimited, and as such it's my job to keep the troops happy whilst steering the ship in the right direction, albeit from time to time through troubled water. It's is such times that define us as a company. All businesses have bad spells, that's the way the cookie crumbles, but what goes around comes around, so we have to take the rough with the smooth you know; shit

happens, as they say...

Stu: [Nodding]

Int: Now, the sort of guy I'm looking for needs to be a good team player. Someone who always looks on the bright side of life. Someone who will bend over backwards to succeed, is hands on and who is prepared to roll his sleeves up and jump right in at the deep end without first stopping to test the water. I need a guy who can think outside the box, not some fly by night who's only in it for the money...

Stu: Ok. [more nodding]

Int: Now I'm the sort of boss who's door is always open. I like a laugh as much as the next man, but there's gotta be a line which you don't cross. I'm firm but fair, but at the end of the day the buck stops with me. Shit rolls down hill and if I'm getting it in the neck from them upstairs you can rest assured I'll be gunning for you guys. But that don't mean I hold a grudge. Life goes on, and life's too short, so I operate a policy of live and learn. You scratch my back and I'll scratch yours yer know? Give and take, that's what its about...

Stu: Yep, yep.

Int: Now I need someone who can think on his feet, someone who's not scared to make a decision and doesn't just sit on the fence. Someone who can grab the bull by the horns, you undertand? Now to me you look like a bloke who currently hasn't got a pot to piss in, but a graduate of the school of hard knocks I'll warrant? And that's just the sort of work-horse I'm after, not some rich kid who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. I believe you're the man for the job, so the jobs there for the taking. The balls in your court. If you want to climb on board this gravy train and dip your bread then move fast or you'll miss the boat. But if you accept the job and graft like a black man, you'll be making money hand over fist and laughing all the way to the bank with more money than there's tea in China. What do you say, now that we've had time to chew the fat...?

Stu: Wow! Well, It's a no brainer! You've certainly laid down the gauntlet which I intend to pick up, and there's no time like the present. I'll take it! You won't regret this. It'll be like shelling peas.

Int: Welcome to Cliches Unlimited.