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Not News
A world-first for British Airways
By woody44
10 March 2007

  `Inspired` by the story of women pilots wanting more flexible rotas to look after their children.....



  British Airways has today announced what is believed to be a first in aviation history.

They have set up a creche in the cockpit of one of their Boeing 747s.

    A spokesperson for the company said with the increase in women pilots they now

felt the time was right for this new initiative.

   `The flightdeck has been stripped of all unnecessary clutter such as the First

Officer, Flight Engineer, instrument panels and none-essential flight controls. In their

place a sand-pit, climbing frame, ball pool and nappy-changing area have been

installed. A fully trained Nanny will also be in attendance.

    `We know from the comments we have been receiving that some of our women

pilots have been finding it increasingly difficult trying to juggle a very demanding job,

which often sees them away from home for several days at a time, and looking after

their very young children. With this new innovation the pilot will be able to have her

child or children with her at all times, which the company feels will make for a much

happier, and  therefore more efficient pilot.`

     Initially only one of BAs aircraft will have these new facilities, but the

spokesperson said that if the idea proved popular with the crew, and passengers had

no objections, the scheme would be rolled out to a further six aircraft in the fleet.
  
   `We know this is ground-breaking in the world of aviation  but with more women

becoming commercial pilots we are  sure other carriers will soon follow suite,` the

spokesperson concluded.

Reviews
HI Woody
Written by jean.day (2257 comments posted) 10th March 2007
Enjoyed this. And why not? Think of all the airmiles those little babies could be collecting. Enough to put them through college.
Hi, Woody!
Written by Bagheera (680 comments posted) 10th March 2007
Musical memories......... 
:grin the line "Cake and eat it" (and everything this implies!) :grin  
 
Comes from the Beatles track "Here Comes the Sun King" on the "Abbey Road" collection ..... typical women! 
 
Unfortunately it wouldn't surprise me if the scenario you describe is soon a reality, the way the "Infringement of my Civil Liberties/Human Rights" Rentamob are getting more and more of their own way ....

Written by Bottleblondesurfer (3298 comments posted) 10th March 2007
Blimey, woody how do you dream these things up: sandpits in the cockpit!!  
I'm just glad you didn't mention breast feeding while landing or post natal depression at 1500ft 
We don't hear nearly enough from you. just give the DIY a rest 
cheers 
J

Written by woody44 (774 comments posted) 11th March 2007
Good morning all. 
 
Jean. Thanks. Nice idea, the babies collecting air miles for college. What I would call real forward planning. 
 
Paul. I must admit to feeling a certain amount of sympathy for the ladies in question. As males I suppose we do go through life fairly `baggage` free! Thanks. 
 
 
Jane. Breast feeding in the cockpit! Next time I fly I think I might ask for a visit `up front`.Incidentally I`ve just heard that the First Officers and Flight engineers are not too happy about being retrained as baggage handlers... 
 
 
regards  
Woody
What!?!
Written by givitsum (651 comments posted) 11th March 2007
Jesus H. Christ, they're letting 'em fly planes now? Whatever next? Letting 'em use drills???? 
 
Good work woody, very clever, and a nice angle on the lastest PC bullshit on the market. There's a good comedy script to be inspired by this somewhere woody, and I think I know just the man.... 
 
Enjoyed. 
 
G.

Written by coosh (844 comments posted) 15th March 2007
Yep, I'm with givitsum on this. Great, simple idea, upon which you could maybe expand. Next thing they'll be accommodating women passengers with those six-kid-wide baby buggies, which are always just full of bags of shopping.

Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 15th March 2007
Really enjoyed this. And I love Jean's idea about the air miles those kids could collect -- along with all the radiation they'd be exposed to up there. BBS is right: we don't hear enough from you. Forget your DIY -- I've just left my hot air gun lying there with the tile cutter, glass putty and sandpaper. 
 
I do know a girl who is now a BA pilot and wanted desperately to be a RAF pilot like her father. She is over six feet tall but was told she could not be an RAF pilot due to her arms being too short. Her arms are longer than mine and I'm one step away from simian in that department. Take my word for it -- she'll want the sand-pits if she ever decides to breed.
Wider and still yet wider....
Written by woody44 (774 comments posted) 15th March 2007
Thanks David and Witzl. Six kid wide buggies! We`ll soon need wider pavements David...now there`s an idea for a piece... 
 
. Sorry Witzl but I`ve now got this mental picture of your friend trying to shoot down an enemy fighter..if only she could just reach that firing button...Thanks again, and how are you fixed for putting me a new conservatory window in... 
 
happy writing 
Woody

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