Quicklinks:
Short S. | Poetry | Not News | Scripts | Comedy | Non-Fiction | SF | Crime | For Kids | Extended | Village
Great Writing - Home > Poetry > Andrew's Motion
READING ROOM
Great Writing - Home
Read and review others' work
Articles on writing
Advice from the community
COMMUNITY
Talk to others in the forums
Events and Competitions
GW News
ABOUT GREAT WRITING
All About Us
Contact Us
WORK AWAITING REVIEW
GW IS...
Great Writing creative writing community is designed to prompt ideas and provide inspiration and motivation within aspiring and amateur authors. Whatever your topic; from love poetry to Doctor Who or Harry Potter fan fiction, Great Writing's online writing group is where you can make new friends and improve your creative writing.
WHO'S ONLINE
We have 1410 guests online and 5 members online
Poetry
print friendly version     
Andrew's Motion
By Talisker
13 March 2007
 

Andy rose today in decent haste.

It seems that last night’s curry,

had the laureate in a hurry,

it Causa Belli,

to expelli,

muchos waste!


These will be no pleasure steamers!

Christ! I feel I am in labour!

Call and fetch Faber & Faber!

in salt water,

getting hotter!

This may be a juicy reamer!


Alas! No zero gravity!

In the wee-est smallest hour,

heading for the water tower,

on Persian rug,

dam ned tummy bug,

As luck would havity…


How now brown coco de macao?

Dost thy gizzard, fizz hard, dost it quake?

Wake Jeeves! Hurry man! Call Doctor Cake!

I feel a flood!

‘tis in the blood!

What dost a posh boy now?


Only the west wing to traverse,

cannot I stem the foul tide?

This conflagration I’ve inside?

But one more corridor!

Ah ha! The privy door!

One toilet in a mansion is a curse!


What didst thou Keats?

Whenst you’d the skeats?

What dost thou Lârkin,

(note the diarrhoea critical mark in!)

when the alimentary clouds doth darken?

Attend! In chorus! “watch what one eats!”


Oli 13/03/07

Reviews
ha ha
Written by fellpony (1580 comments posted) 13th March 2007
You got, pardon the pun, nearly to the bottom of it. I feel sure there is a joke or two unexposed: I am hearing the current Expedia ad at present: let yourself go. 
 
 
:grin :grin
Glad you got that out . . .
Written by Witzl (1585 comments posted) 13th March 2007
Expeditious humor at its best. No, I don't know what that means either. Sounds good though, doesn't it?  
 
If you haven't heard Southpark doing 'Mr Henky's Christmas Poo,' Oli, then I suggest you find this immediately and listen to it. It is right up your line.  
 
This was right up my line too . . . um, so to speak that is, and no pun intended.

Written by stevetroster (1549 comments posted) 13th March 2007
I do not feel that I am qualified to critique poetry, so I'll critique this instead. 
I laughed so much that I almost freed myself from impediments. 
I can only assume that as you relayed your message so eloquently that you must be a player of the trouser trumpet? I myself am an accomplished bottom bassoonist! now if we can only find someone to play the leg-horn.

Written by Phil (6645 comments posted) 13th March 2007
Hi Oli, you might guess that this was right up my alley - pun intended. Just had a look at Motion's web site. There are a few e-mail addresses there - perhaps you could send him a copy for appraisal.  
 
Thoroughly enjoyed. 
 
Phil.

   Only registered users can rate and write comments.
   Please login or register.

Powered by AkoComment 2.0!
 Previous item   Next item
This site is copyright 2005 - 2007 Great Writing. Work submitted by members remains the copyright of the respective authors.
See our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.