SOURCE(NeuteredNEWS): In an impromptu news conference called by the Pentagon, a US official stated that Americans do in fact get irony.

Pressed for more details the official cited medical reports for returning WW2 GIs, many of whom doctors diagnosed to be suffering from  'Venereal Diseases, Shell shock and a laconic ironic wit'.

Research revealed that the soldiers stationed in England suffered mainly from the venereal diseases and the ironic wit, while those that had met the French had shell shock. The researchers were further able to distil the essence of irony and presented their findings to the Pentagon. The Pentagon officials keen to exercise their new found comedic vehicle decided to withhold their findings from the rest of the world, which caused many a chuckle filled meeting in the oval office as agents from around Europe relayed eavesdropped conversations lamenting the American inability to get irony.

Soon a nationwide program was developed to teach the basics of irony to every school child in America, and while the rest of the world thought they were learning to survive nuclear attacks by hiding under their school desks, they were in fact reading specially prepared notes on the bottom of their desks.

Asked why it had taken the Pentagon so long to come clean the official replied,

 "Sheesh guys we have been dropping hints for awhile now, you know saying things like 'We think Saddam may have WMDs' after we sold him most of the ones he did have."

This begged the question as to whether other countries, like Iran, have also had any Irony Development programs. A UN official assured reporters that Tehran had failed to make Enriched Irony and thus far only has a gaggle of expectant spectators watching unsuspecting pedestrians as they walk up to a deceptively deep puddle.

The official also stated that there have been calls for Joke War amendments to the Geneva Convention. It is understood the French have categorically condemned these amendments as they list Jerry Lewis as a hazardous substance.