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Poetry


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OUR NEW WORLD

By JohnnyD

03 April 2007

HAMARA NAYA SANSAR by famous Hindi poet Manmohan is the original poem. Please note the metaphor the poet has used to describe our new world.

OUR NEW WORLD

The slate is so very disciplined
It remains clean all the time

Its smooth silky surface
never even allows
Dust particles of truth to remain on it intact

Everyday's play ends
With the balance sheet intact

With one hand you write
The second erases it so efficiently!

Johnny D
9th March 2007

Reviews

Written by Phil (6963 comments posted) 3rd April 2007

Johnny, you're like a bus: no sign of one for ages and then loads come at once.

Your translations are interesting but lack the poetic structure I assume the original had. Maybe verse in Hindi is written very differently as far as rhythm and rhyme go.

Your own poems do little for me. I still admire your grasp of English, but I fear it's not strong enough to write poetry. I guess it would be unfair not to mention English is not your first language, but your poetry must be reviewed as poetry and not the doodlings of a language student.

Still a long way to go. Sorry.

Phil.

Our New World
Written by Josie (2847 comments posted) 3rd April 2007

I have to disagree with Manmohan, but wish sometimes that what he said really was true. Whatever is written on our slates (our hearts or minds) can't be wiped clean. It may be good things that we wish to retain, but it may be things that we wish were completely wiped away. I'm afraid that part of the learning process comes from remembering and learning from that experience. This is why humans, and animals too, find it so hard to move on after something bad has happened. Don't you agree? The problem is that the dust lingers, and even though we say "we forgive" and try to move on, whatever has happened remains in the heart, just under the surface, ready to spring to life again in a similar circumstance. That is why there are so many psychiatrists who are kept busy in this world.

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